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> Lurking with Blorg the Almighty, I'm not dead you fucks.

 
post Nov 23 2012, 19:17
Post #1541
grumpymal



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You know what we need? A hero. A hero to save us. And that hero's name is Blorg.
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post Nov 23 2012, 19:30
Post #1542
(sic)



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Does he fashion a promiscuous attire in all his adventures?
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post Nov 23 2012, 21:05
Post #1543
BlorgAlmighty



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Did I just hear the words Thanksgiving? No? Well it doesn't matter because we're doing a Thanksgiving Day special anyways on Cooking with Blorg the Almighty and noah the body!

Thanksgiving is a global holiday where you give thanks to the omnipotent Aztec turkey god Quetzalcoatl, who feasted upon the blood of sacrifices and gave the Aztecs many years of peace and an eternity of freedom in return. To honor their commitment to this great god, Aztecs have been eating turkey since the mid-1700s! And now, we too will partake in this holiday delight!

There are so many ways to prepare a turkey!
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/01Turkey.jpg)
You can put it between two slices of bread and make a sandwich!
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/02Sandwich.jpg)
Feeling daring? Just use one slice of bread and make an open-face sandwich! Add gravy if you want!
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/03OpenFace.jpg)
Put it in a soup!
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/04Soup.jpg)
Put it in a stew!
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/05Stew.jpg)
Did you know about the turkey burger?
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/06Burger.jpg)
Eat a turkey while in Turkey!
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/07Turkish.jpg)
Of course, you can't eat raw turkey, it has to be cooked! So today I'll be showing you how to cook a turkey, Aztec-style!

INGREDIENTS:
  • 1 freshly-killed turkey
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/08NotaTurkey.jpg)
So... um... yeah. I'm pretty sure this isn't a turkey. Um....

DIRECTIONS:
JESUS FUCK IT'S ALIVE.
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/09Alive.jpg)
GET IT OFF ME! GET IT OFF ME!
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/10OhNo.jpg)
REOIHQWRARJP#*YROHFQFH:QTRP(*Y@:@F*#
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/11Demise.jpg)
(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Sushi/17End.jpg)

This post has been edited by BlorgAlmighty: Nov 23 2012, 21:06
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post Nov 23 2012, 21:09
Post #1544
noahbody



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Blorg is the hero these forums deserve.

But not the one it needs right now.

He is a silent guardian.

A watchful protector.

A Vakuen.
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post Nov 23 2012, 21:11
Post #1545
noahbody



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p.s.: I wish you guys were here on set, Blorg is fighting very valiantly with the alien turkey.

NON-EDIT: Blorg is now using his laser vision to roast it. It smells delicious.
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post Nov 23 2012, 21:20
Post #1546
BlorgAlmighty



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JUSTICE PREVAILS.

(IMG:[img.photobucket.com] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/kenbest/Making%20Turkey/TRIUMPH.jpg)
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post Nov 23 2012, 21:28
Post #1547
noahbody



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And for the next episode with Cooking with the Blorg the Almighty and Noah the Body, we bring some holiday festivities, as we cook Santa Claus with Lemon Sauce.
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post Nov 24 2012, 01:04
Post #1548
TotalWhittle



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I hope you ate the whole thing and then some for Thanksgiving, Blorg. Judging from those totally non-fabricated pictures of this event, you're skinny as a reed.
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post Nov 24 2012, 04:12
Post #1549
grumpymal



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Blorg makes Flash Gordon look like a grade schooler. *swoon*
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post Nov 25 2012, 13:03
Post #1550
grumpymal



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I'm going to miss Yoshinoya. Blorg, can you teach me how to cook gyudon?
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post Nov 25 2012, 22:03
Post #1551
noahbody



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Noahkins: Blorg-kun, Blorg-kun

Noahkins: Do you have any smoked turkey?

Blorgkun: You already ate some, didn't you?

Noahkins: GYUDO~N
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post Nov 26 2012, 03:08
Post #1552
gamagaeru



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I miss having gyudon at Yoshinoya. I hate the midwestern US right now.
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post Nov 26 2012, 03:47
Post #1553
Msgr. Radixius



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(IMG:[cdn.bulbagarden.net] http://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/7/70/383Groudon.png/280px-383Groudon.png)

Am I doing it right?
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post Nov 26 2012, 05:07
Post #1554
gamagaeru



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QUOTE(radixius @ Nov 26 2012, 10:47) *

(IMG:[cdn.bulbagarden.net] http://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/7/70/383Groudon.png/280px-383Groudon.png)

Am I doing it right?

Probably tastes like chicken.
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post Nov 26 2012, 22:47
Post #1555
noahbody



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That Pokémon definitely tastes like crab.

I can taste it.

It's crab.
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post Nov 27 2012, 07:35
Post #1556
grumpymal



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QUOTE(noahbody @ Nov 25 2012, 16:03) *

Noahkins: Blorg-kun, Blorg-kun

Noahkins: Do you have any smoked turkey?

Blorgkun: You already ate some, didn't you?

Noahkins: GYUDO~N

:3c
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post Nov 27 2012, 08:59
Post #1557
Msgr. Radixius



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I always invert Tard like this 3:
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post Nov 27 2012, 11:17
Post #1558
noahbody



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QUOTE(radixius @ Nov 26 2012, 22:59) *

3:


This one looks like that MythBusters guy.

What's his name?

Maurice. I think it's Maurice.

Maybe Phil.

This post has been edited by noahbody: Nov 27 2012, 11:18
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post Nov 27 2012, 21:36
Post #1559
Msgr. Radixius



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QUOTE(noahbody @ Nov 27 2012, 03:17) *

Maurice. I think it's Maurice.


Crazy old Maurice, he's always good for a laugh.
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post Nov 28 2012, 00:02
Post #1560
noahbody



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On the next episode of cooking with the Blorg, we cook Maurice.


Maurice is of course, the Pokemon who is good for a laugh.

This post has been edited by noahbody: Nov 28 2012, 00:02
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