QUOTE(Xyresic @ Aug 16 2016, 15:20)
Anyone want to help take a look at a script again? :'D
I had a Chinese friend go over the script from the Chinese TLs so I don't think I'm too far off in any of the translations. Inb4 I get stomped over again like last time.
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Your biggest problem is everything is worded really awkward and overly literal. Even assuming there were no errors in translation, if I took the time to go through it all, I'd probably end up re-writing every single line so it reads and flows how people actually talk and write.
A tip: instead of thinking about it as "how can I write this series of Japanese words into English?", think of it more like "how can I get across the same meaning, feeling, and connotation as this using English?"
Just an example from the preface:
シンデレラガールズ、2期もいいですね～。あたらしい話が放映される
たびに違うキャラ描きたくなって困ります。城ヶ崎姉とみりあおねちゃん
もいい…。今回の本はアイドルとプロヂューサーのパライベートショット
集ということで。コミ１で出した本の完成版です。（２０１５．８．大槍葦人）
The second season of Cinderella Girls is great as well, right? After every episode I want to draw a different character, it's troubling. I would have liked to draw the older Jougasaki sister and Miria-oneechan as well... This time, the book is a private shot from the lives of the idols and Producer. The completed version will be available at Comic One.
Which I'd end up re-writing/re-translating to something like
The second season of Cinderella girls is great. Every new episode that airs makes me want to draw another character, which is a problem for me. I also really like the older Jougasaki with Miria-oneechan... This time, the book is a collection of private shots from the lives of the idols and the producer. It's the finished version of the one I put out at Comic 1.
Hey, there was also a minor translation mistake in that last sentence. I could keep going, but it would likely end up being more of a re-translation from scratch than a fixing of yours...
That probably came off sounding crueler than I intended.
Random translation help
Aug 11 2016, 07:42
