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雑談

Uhhh.... this is embarrassing. Thank you Thira. :P

This post has been edited by VVayfarer: Feb 3 2015, 19:20

I'm translating a tentacle rape manga. I would link it but it has guro. Can I get some help and proofreading?

食事もしたし...産もうかしら
So as far as I can tell, the tentacle monster is talking about having the protags as a meal, then ponders impregnating them, but I don't know the exact meaning here. も means also, so if I didn't have anyone to ask I'd translate it as "You could be my meal, but you could also bear my young"

However, I feel like she (the tentacle monster is a girl who inserts eggs into people) could also be talking about herself i.e. "I could just have a meal, but I could also have children/lay my eggs in you"


Other than that, here's some other lines that I get the gist of but would like to be proofread

森の奥の洞窟に人食い触手が現れるとの噂を耳にした、腕自信がある勇者君。
Within a cave in the inner forest, a man-eating tentacle monster is rumored to have appeared, so heard a young hero confident in his ability, Yuusha-kun.
(I know they're really just saying he's a young hero and Yuusha isn't his actual name, but for the sake of the flow of the dialogue I'm calling him Yuusha-kun rather than just "Hero" or "Hero-kun")

人食い触手を倒すべく、仲間の魔法使いとニ手に分かれ森の奥へと向かった。
In order to defeat the monster, he and his companion, a mage, had split up as they had ventured into the inner forest.

私へ生贄かな？
Did you come to sacrifice yourself to me?

まだ生きてるわよ。ちゃんと生きたまま苗床にするの
He's still alive. I'll make him into a fine living incubator [for my eggs]
勿論、あなたもね。
Of course, you'll be one too.


勇者くん大丈夫？
Yuusha-kun, are you alright?
...そうだわ
Seems like it
勇者君のここにまだあるんだったわね。こっちにも入れましょう
There's still more to be done in this part of Yuusha-kun. I'll inject [my eggs] here too.


あなた達みたいなのに退治されちゃうから、沢山たくさん産まなきゃいけないのよ。
Although you boys are like this, since you came to exterminate me, I had to lay a whole lot [of my eggs].


食料に困らないし、また弱い子が来てくれないかしら...
[Getting] food is such a bother, I wonder if any more weak kids will show up...

食事もしたし...産もうかしら

森の奥の洞窟に人食い触手が現れるとの噂を耳にした、腕自信がある勇者君。

人食い触手を倒すべく、仲間の魔法使いとニ手に分かれ森の奥へと向かった。
In order to defeat the monster, he and his companion, a mage, had split up as they had ventured into the inner forest.

私へ生贄かな？
Did you come to sacrifice yourself to me?

...そうだわ
Seems like it

勇者君のここにまだあるんだったわね。こっちにも入れましょう
There's still more to be done in this part of Yuusha-kun. I'll inject [my eggs] here too.

あなた達みたいなのに退治されちゃうから、沢山たくさん産まなきゃいけないのよ。
Although you boys are like this, since you came to exterminate me, I had to lay a whole lot [of my eggs].

食料に困らないし、また弱い子が来てくれないかしら...
[Getting] food is such a bother, I wonder if any more weak kids will show up...

You only had mistakes in first sentence and near end, as far as I can see. I left out everything where you seemed to know the effect you wanted (I don't know the context, so I wouldn't be able to help much anyway there).

Starting from the first:

Now that I've eaten and all... maybe I should give birth. /// '... I might as well give birth then' /// '... I guess I could give birth.' /// etc

Yuusha-kun, who has confidence in his skills, heard a rumor of man-eating tentacles appearing in the cave deep inside the forest. /// a bit closer in grammar, but yours might work better, who knows

Next:
In order to defeat the man-eating tentacles (... and the rest as you said)

Another sacrifice for me? /// your liberal version might work better though

Hopping over some:

そうだわ
I am /// yours is again liberal /// *** I assume this is in response to the previous sentence

勇者君のここにまだあるんだったわね。こっちにも入れましょう
Yuusha-kun still has some (space?) in this spot, lets put some in here too. /// not too different here either /// she could be implying she hadn't noticed or had forgotten about it, depending on context

あなた達みたいなのに退治されちゃうから、沢山たくさん産まなきゃいけないのよ。
Since the likes of you keep exterminating them, I have to give birth to a lot of them. /// I have to create many of them /// etc

食料に困らないし、また弱い子が来てくれないかしら.
Since there's plenty of food (now?), I wonder if other weaklings won't show up... /// 'weaklings' -> 'weak boys', 'weak kids' (as you had) /// first sentence could also simply be something to the effect of: "Now we've got enough food too," / "We don't have a shortage of food (anymore?)" /// *last sentence: 'I wonder if still more weaklings will show up...' ///

This post has been edited by VVayfarer: Feb 4 2015, 14:25

そうだわ
I am /// yours is again liberal /// *** I assume this is in response to the previous sentence

Thanks for the help, just two things for follow-up. For the そうだわ line, the tentacle monster is answering her own question, I should have given the context. I'll give it here.

So the lines go, one after the other in succession, all by the tentacle monster:

勇者くん大丈夫？...そうだわ。勇者君のここにまだあるんだったわね。こっちにも入れましょう

Given the context, do you think "Seems like it" was accurate for "...そうだわ"?

Also, after 私へ生贄かな？

The tentacle monster says 少し遊んじゃお
I had had this translated as "I'll play around with you a bit, then."
Does this seem accurate?

This post has been edited by Nanashi123: Feb 4 2015, 16:18

Thanks for the help, just two things for follow-up. For the そうだわ line, the tentacle monster is answering her own question, I should have given the context. I'll give it here.

So the lines go, one after the other in succession, all by the tentacle monster:

勇者くん大丈夫？...そうだわ。勇者君のここにまだあるんだったわね。こっちにも入れましょう

Given the context, do you think "Seems like it" was accurate for "...そうだわ"?

Also, after 私へ生贄かな？

The tentacle monster says 少し遊んじゃお
I had had this translated as "I'll play around with you a bit, then."
Does this seem accurate?

Oh, so that's how it was (I read that entirely wrong then), it's more along the lines of:

"Yuusha-kun, are you alright?... Oh, that's right, there was still some space (or something?) left here in Yuusha-kun, let's put some in here too.

It could also be translated as "Oh, I know," or something similar, but 'that's right' seems to fit better at first glance. The 'Oh' isn't necessary there, but I added it to make the meaning clearer.

And that should be accurate (although liberal again), more literally/straightforwardly it could be ex.g. "Lets play a bit" /// "I'll play a bit (then)" or something.

okay, as per suggested by Izur, I post my problem here

so,

淫 means lewd, horny, or everything like that etc
魔 means demon...

sex demon, lewd demon, horny demon....

any better suggestion? I'm translating for serious content so from 3 options i have I will use sex demon... but well, any better suggestion? or anything is okay, just throw it in, I will see it

P.S. definitely not incubus and succubus
Touhou content with Alice and doll

link for the gallery page 9 last panel

and thank you for your attention : 3

Edit: the link https://e-hentai.org/g/751508/ece746e861/

This post has been edited by webdriver: Feb 5 2015, 13:09

Demon of Lust maybe? :) You pretty much said it all though, especially if it's not succubus or something like that.

And the gallery seems to have been removed.

Demon of Lust maybe? (IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) You pretty much said it all though, especially if it's not succubus or something like that.

And the gallery seems to have been removed.

thanks for the suggestion, I just fix the link it should go to the g.e-hentai... but I dunno why it still goes to g.e-h

edit: are all word e-x-hentai turned to e-hentai???.. T_T

bounty link

This post has been edited by webdriver: Feb 5 2015, 13:11

淫 means lewd, horny, or everything like that etc
魔 means demon...

"淫魔" is basically translated into Incubus(/Succubus).
Also sometimes, it's translated into Alp, Empusa, Lilin or something.

Thanks for the help last time ... much appreciated

Now I have two questions
1)What does "dohamari" ドハマリ mean? (and what does it mean in porn context)
I couldn't find anything meaningful

2)仕上げる - to finish up; to complete (work)
But what is meant here (circled bubble)

Does she say she's going to clean herself up until the next meeting or does she want the guys she's taking to to take her for a joyride?

Oh, so that's how it was (I read that entirely wrong then), it's more along the lines of:

"Yuusha-kun, are you alright?... Oh, that's right, there was still some space (or something?) left here in Yuusha-kun, let's put some in here too.

It could also be translated as "Oh, I know," or something similar, but 'that's right' seems to fit better at first glance. The 'Oh' isn't necessary there, but I added it to make the meaning clearer.

And that should be accurate (although liberal again), more literally/straightforwardly it could be ex.g. "Lets play a bit" /// "I'll play a bit (then)" or something.

Alright, thanks a bunch!

Thanks for the help last time ... much appreciated

Now I have two questions
1)What does "dohamari" ドハマリ mean? (and what does it mean in porn context)
I couldn't find anything meaningful

2)仕上げる - to finish up; to complete (work)
But what is meant here (circled bubble)

Does she say she's going to clean herself up until the next meeting or does she want the guys she's taking to to take her for a joyride?

1) It means someone's super into something, in porn it means 'highly addicted' or something similar to that.

2) She's saying she'll "make herself into" the 'female pussy toilet' or whatever. "Until next meeting, I will make sure to become the kind of female pussy toilet that would enjoy being cummed inside so much as to faint while ejaculating' --- this is a clunky translation, but at least you should get what she's saying now.

Here, it's the meaning of 'to complete (work)', where 'work' refers to herself. It can be used for works of art or stuff like that too. Hopefully this isn't confusing.

Is there a good way to translate oniisan/oneesan when the person being referred to is close to the person calling them it, but not blood-related (like a neighbour, family friend or even just a guest) and using their actual name isn't an option?

Something like "mister" seems too impersonal. Leaving it untranslated doesn't really seem like an option (unless a TL note is added explaining it)

Is there a good way to translate oniisan/oneesan when the person being referred to is close to the person calling them it, but not blood-related (like a neighbour, family friend or even just a guest) and using their actual name isn't an option?

Something like "mister" seems too impersonal. Leaving it untranslated doesn't really seem like an option (unless a TL note is added explaining it)

There's really not. I've seen "Big Bro" before, but it's neither very comfortable to use nor very accurate (as in, no child speaking English would ever really say that). That's why I generally always leave nii/nee/sensei alone. There simply is no analogous usage in English that doesn't come across as stupidly thick. To be honest, you probably don't even need a TL NOTE. It's not a bad idea, of course, but any manga/anime/hentai/doujin fan is probably going to know the word anyway.

UF

Would you do anything to translate the differences in honorifics used between siblings? (e.g. onee-san, nee-san, onee-sama, onee, onee-chan, aneki, etc)

Is it even important to denote a difference here?

EDIT: assuming you were to even translate these

This post has been edited by rqwrqw: Feb 7 2015, 08:52

I would translate none of those. I would simply use the original words with their original honorifics. Kun/chan/san/dono/sama/etc are worth keeping. Sensei and "ojou" usually also are kept, though not 100% of the time. Self referential 3rd person is more problematic, but is also usually kept (e.g. Mitsuki says "Mitsuki's pussy feels good!").

I'll let you in on an old Eroge translator's trick though. For longer projects, every so often you should translate the term for your English speaking audience just to drive the point in. For example, if a character calls her brother Onii-chan, translate it as Onii-chan most of the time but every so often use "Brother." Granted, this sort of reinforcement works better when you are translating 80,000 lines of script rather than 75 bubbles.

UF

Hmm. Do you leave honorifics on words like goshujin-sama, kami-sama, etc (or when -san is attached to something that isn't a name, like referring to someone by their profession or some other descriptive word then tacking on -san), or do you just translate the word itself because the honorific isn't important?

What about honorifics that are slightly less common, like haha-ue/chichi-ue? And stuff like ojiisan/ojiisan/ossan/jiijii/variants like that (words that you might expect someone to know if they've been around this stuff a while, but not if they're relatively new)?

Is it just a matter of deciding on a case-by-case basis how to translate honorifics or is there a standard list you'll leave untranslated and translate the rest in some fashion?

EDIT: Also, the honorifics that are perhaps less common or region-specific, like han, tan, pon, chama etc - just leave them be?

This post has been edited by rqwrqw: Feb 7 2015, 11:32

Hmm. Do you leave honorifics on words like goshujin-sama, kami-sama, etc (or when -san is attached to something that isn't a name, like referring to someone by their profession or some other descriptive word then tacking on -san), or do you just translate the word itself because the honorific isn't important?

What about honorifics that are slightly less common, like haha-ue/chichi-ue? And stuff like ojiisan/ojiisan/ossan/jiijii/variants like that (words that you might expect someone to know if they've been around this stuff a while, but not if they're relatively new)?

Is it just a matter of deciding on a case-by-case basis how to translate honorifics or is there a standard list you'll leave untranslated and translate the rest in some fashion?

EDIT: Also, the honorifics that are perhaps less common or region-specific, like han, tan, pon, chama etc - just leave them be?

Lol, even if there was a standard list, it would be extremely arbitrary. You should have a general idea of what the (somewhat experienced) audience should know and what they probably wouldn't know. After that, it's really about whether you prefer including Japanese words (and maybe teaching them through TL notes) yourself or whether you're hell-bent on anglicizing everything. I'm personally heavily biased towards the former, but you'll find tons of experienced translators from both sides of the spectrum.

Also it depends on the manga / doujin / etc. Especially if it's based on a culture of an anglophonic country, you might want to go for a 'more translated' text. On the other hand, if it's highly entangled with Japanese culture, you're going to save yourself a lot of trouble by being more faithful. Then again, there are some stories that have been (arguably) been made better after parts of them were rewritten for smoother localization (imo this would include the Ace Attorney -series); it is very impressive when it works out, but usually we end up with an (arguably...) inferior product.

And if a doujin seems to be targeted at a niche audience (that is, the kind that might form among existing fans of doujins etc), you might want to lean towards untranslated. Chances are, 99.9% of the people who read it have seen tons of other stuff as well and know the terms already.

As for your examples, for whatever my 2 cents are worth:

Goshujin-sama is often just translated to 'master', and kami-sama to 'Lord' or something (if based on anime etc, you might want to look up how any major translations handle the terms). If you are going to use the words themselves, you should use honorifics too, since -they change the tone of the word (for 'goshujin-sama', it wouldn't even make much sense without as when used by maids etc). For professions, I'd use Mr / Ms etc or -san, or drop it if it sounded more natural that way, but I'd think it's entirely context-dependent.

I'm personally biased towards just teaching the audience whatever I feel like using, but more neutrally speaking, you might want to avoid using too uncommon words. Hahaue / chichiue could be Mother / Father or some other respectful variant or just left as is, whichever you prefer really. You should probably use TL notes there though. For oji-san / ossan I'd probably use 'Mister' for oji-san, ossan as is (although you could use a liberal word there).

For jii-san's variants, it's really about what kind of work you're translating. If it seems like it could do puns etc, you might want to go untranslated. It would also be consistent with the way other family members are translated as well. But you probably want to decide on a case-by-case basis.

-chama -tan -han etc, just leave as it is really unless, again, you're hell-bent on anglicizing stuff, as it would seem kind of weird to just drop them.

This post has been edited by VVayfarer: Feb 7 2015, 14:24

+1 for VVayfarer. I agree nearly 100% with his post. I regularly translate goshujin as Master, though I have left Kami-sama alone before.

That said, as much as I enjoyed Phoenix Wright, the localization had nothing to do with it. Personally, I think ignoring/glossing over story elements that would set the scene in a foreign location is laziness and more than mildly insulting.

UF

+1 for VVayfarer. I agree nearly 100% with his post. I regularly translate goshujin as Master, though I have left Kami-sama alone before.

That said, as much as I enjoyed Phoenix Wright, the localization had nothing to do with it. Personally, I think ignoring/glossing over story elements that would set the scene in a foreign location is laziness and more than mildly insulting.

UF

I agree, and I was somewhat ambiguous there. While the localization could've made the games much worse, thanks to the translation, I personally enjoyed it even more than the original -- it did lose some points in seriousness, but the comedy is amped up more than enough to make up for it. This might be just my sense of humor, but especially in parts where it's obvious what the characters were originally saying, I seriously lmao'd at some of the choices made by the translators. :D

This post has been edited by VVayfarer: Feb 7 2015, 21:20