[X] My Assistant

その剣は陰の書と共に・桃色の怪物を・ひもとく物として
この国に伝えられて・いたのですか・シーメンに持ち去られていたのです。

Page 33: https://e-hentai.org/s/1f79a3b184/18679-33
Does anyone know what ほもとく物　means?
That's the only word that I couldn't find anywhere.

Looks like it might be this.
[club.japanknowledge.com] http://club.japanknowledge.com/jk_blog/nih...00517_post.html

So maybe, "as (something) to find out about the Pink monster".

This post has been edited by PeopleDon'tDanceNoMore: Apr 25 2012, 05:06

Looks like it might be this.
[club.japanknowledge.com] http://club.japanknowledge.com/jk_blog/nih...00517_post.html

So maybe, "as (something) to find out about the Pink monster".

Thanks. I get it now (IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)
Himotoku means to peruse (a book). Now I get what it means (IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/smile.gif).

This post has been edited by piotr012: Apr 25 2012, 05:18

proofreading comments

"Prophesy" - should be "Prophecy"? (appears several times)

"I'm going to exploit you tomorrow again!"

use would probably sound better than exploit

editing bounty for 17: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=5663
translation bounty for 19: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=5662 (picture coming as soon as the e-h galleries stop giving me issues)

I'm probably setting myself up for trouble, but i'll get this rolling by editing 17 after SS.

This post has been edited by Super Shanko: Apr 25 2012, 08:20

I'm probably setting myself up for trouble, but i'll get this rolling by editing 17 after SS.

It should be so bad. I've improved my translation by a huge factor since that time.
I also changed the format similar to one that PeopleDon'tDanceNoMore mentioned.

Now the meaning of this translation is much closer to the original. If anyone who read the previous version can look at this one. It's possible to read it directly from the browser.
Episode 17 volume 3 chapter 1
[goo.gl] http://goo.gl/0Ld2O



This post has been edited by piotr012: May 1 2012, 22:35

Episode 18 volume 3 chapter 2
[goo.gl] http://goo.gl/cC8ev



I'm still not sure what names should I use for:
陰の魔導書　= Shadow Grimoire or maybe Magical Book of Darkness or ...
陰の書　= 陰の魔導書 This book is referred using a shorter form. Perhaps, I should also change the name to something like Shadow Book
陰の怪物 = Shadow Monster ? Should those be just called Shadow Monsters?

There were a few translations that I wasn't completely sure of. I marked it in the text. Let me know if you have any comments, suggestions.

This post has been edited by piotr012: May 1 2012, 22:36

陰の魔導書 = Shadow Grimoire or maybe Magical Book of Darkness or ...
陰の書 = 陰の魔導書 This book is referred using a shorter form. Perhaps, I should also change the name to something like Shadow Book
陰の怪物 = Shadow Monster ? Should those be just called Shadow Monsters?

"Shadow Grimoire" is alright, but I'll bet Itoyoko also intended it as a pun on "female genitals", so I think a more straightforward translation like "Grimoire of the Yin" works better.

For 陰の書, just saying "the Grimoire" works better from an English perspective.

For 陰の怪物, I think it's only one (not plural "monsterS"), the same one they later call the Pink Monster. (This also supports the "yin"/"female genitalia" pun, since the Pink Cavern in volume 1 made it very clear that "Pink" is meant to have a sexual connotation; so 陰 probably has a sexual connotation, too.)


サンタとやら・なかなかよい・体をしてていますね
Santa, you have quite good body...
"Santa, you have quite a good body..." That's all.

向白き神々よ・この者に宿いし・黒き病を・取りのぞき・たまえ
Hear me goods! Remove disease of darkness that dwells in this vessel.
INTERNAL NOTE Could someone verify this translation. It sound like an old chant. I tried to make it sound like one. I hope hat I got the meaning right.
Pretty nice. But, improving on it a little, I suggest: "Hear me, gods of good! Remove the dark disease dwelling in this vessel."

何か・しってることは・ないのか？
Isn't there anything that you may know about her
Not necessarily about Pink, just any clues, period.

別にこれといって・ないがよかったら・ピンクを・煮るなり焼くなり・好きなように・いじくっていいぜ
Not really, I don't have anything to say about her.
However, if you would like I can fiddle with Pink do thing like boiling or baking her.
"Nothing really comes to mind, but if you want, go ahead and boil Pink or roast her or do whatever you like to her."

"Shadow Grimoire" is alright, but I'll bet Itoyoko also intended it as a pun on "female genitals", so I think a more straightforward translation like "Grimoire of the Yin" works better.

For 陰の書, just saying "the Grimoire" works better from an English perspective.

For 陰の怪物, I think it's only one (not plural "monsterS"), the same one they later call the Pink Monster. (This also supports the "yin"/"female genitalia" pun, since the Pink Cavern in volume 1 made it very clear that "Pink" is meant to have a sexual connotation; so 陰 probably has a sexual connotation, too.)
サンタとやら・なかなかよい・体をしてていますね
Santa, you have quite good body...
"Santa, you have quite a good body..." That's all.

向白き神々よ・この者に宿いし・黒き病を・取りのぞき・たまえ
Hear me goods! Remove disease of darkness that dwells in this vessel.
INTERNAL NOTE Could someone verify this translation. It sound like an old chant. I tried to make it sound like one. I hope hat I got the meaning right.
Pretty nice. But, improving on it a little, I suggest: "Hear me, gods of good! Remove the dark disease dwelling in this vessel."
何か・しってることは・ないのか？
Isn't there anything that you may know about her
Not necessarily about Pink, just any clues, period.

別にこれといって・ないがよかったら・ピンクを・煮るなり焼くなり・好きなように・いじくっていいぜ
Not really, I don't have anything to say about her.
However, if you would like I can fiddle with Pink do thing like boiling or baking her.
"Nothing really comes to mind, but if you want, go ahead and boil Pink or roast her or do whatever you like to her."

Thanks. Yes, that's much more accurate.

I didn't realize that 陰 was a pun. It was strange to me that the author was using 陰 instead of 影.

Oh, I didn't realize that 陰の怪物 =　桃色の怪物。
In that case I would be for replacing both of those terms with "Pink Monster".
Because it is probably clear to Japanese reader that they are one and the same monster.
I wanted to make it clear that the monster released by Semen is the same one that the princess talks about.

So if we call call 陰の怪物 Pink Monster. 0
Then we could also call 陰の魔導書 Pink Grimoire to make it clean that this book is related to the Pink Monster (Pink Dragon, Santa and Pink don't seem to realize that they are one and the same).
And 陰の書 just the Grimoire.

This post has been edited by piotr012: Apr 26 2012, 11:00

Oh, I didn't realize that 陰の怪物 =　桃色の怪物。
In that case I would be for replacing both of those terms with "Pink Monster".
Because it is probably clear to Japanese reader that they are one and the same monster.
I wanted to make it clear that the monster released by Semen is the same one that the princess talks about.

The Japanese uses significantly different words, so we shall, as well. 陰 shall be yin, and 桃色 pink. It's that simple.

The pun is pretty deep even in Japanese, assuming (I think it's a decent bet, but there's no guarantees) Itoyoko meant it, so there's nothing wrong with having a similarly difficult to make connection in our translation. Those readers who happen to draw the connection will just have a neat bit of trivia to wonder at; it's not vital to the story, nothing we have to beat the reader over the head with.

In that case I'll use the words:
Grimoire of the Jin
the Grimoire
Pink Monster
Yin Monster
I will just post in brackets information that Yin Monster is the same as Pink Monster



Page 31: https://e-hentai.org/s/9c0ba6693c/18679-31
奴は欲にかれて・封印されていた・陰の怪物を・復活を生け贄に（いけにえ・していったのじゃ
That guy was consumed by greed, he sacrificed people to revive sealed Yin Monster (Pink Monster). Later on I'll use the name Pink Monster. I'll leave the decision to editor, whenever he wants to remove that additional information on not.

BTW I've started working on chapter 3.

奴は欲にかれて・封印されていた・陰の怪物を・復活を生け贄に（いけにえ・していったのじゃ
That guy was consumed by greed, he sacrificed people to revive sealed Yin Monster (Pink Monster). Later on I'll use the name Pink Monster. I'll leave the decision to editor, whenever he wants to remove that additional information on not.

It's not much of a decision. It's absolutely going to be removed sooner or later, at the very least when I point it out during QC.

We could have a TL note somewhere. I am quite fond of those...

It's not a note. It's an inference. I'm fairly sure they're the same, but that's still my own deduction. Readers can likewise deduce the same thing. The very fact that Yin Monster and Pink Monster are mentioned in the same chapter ought to raise flags, all by itself. That's all that happened for me, reading the raw.

It's not a note. It's an inference. I'm fairly sure they're the same, but that's still my own deduction. Readers can likewise deduce the same thing. The very fact that Yin Monster and Pink Monster are mentioned in the same chapter ought to raise flags, all by itself. That's all that happened for me, reading the raw.

Ok. I'll keep those those name separate.


I have finished translating chapter 3 of volume 3 of Dragon Pink.
[goo.gl] http://goo.gl/QBv8P

Let me know what do you think. Should I try guessing what SFX mean? Even if can't find them in any dictionary. Should I change anything about SFX sounds?

There is one world that I didn't get.
ピンク　こんなに・しこっちまって・どうしたんだ・
For now I use the following translation:
Pink, what up with you?

I'm not sure what word shikocchimatte means. I couldn't find it in dictionary. It is probably a slang for another word that I don't recognize or maybe those are two words put together. Who knows.

Cool.

Please note that due to galleries having issues recently the posting of new bounties is disabled. I'll post the new editing and translation bounties as soon as it becomes possible again.

I've started working on chapter 4.

Bounties for chapters 4 and 5 are already created. Maybe, the server will be fixed by the time you want to put the bounty on chapter 6.

This post has been edited by piotr012: Apr 28 2012, 15:47

I've finished working on the chapter 4 of volume 3 (episode 20)
[goo.gl] http://goo.gl/EfnRm

I'll start working on chapter 5, once the bounty is completed (IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

I would like to know what you think about my translation, whenever there is anything that needs to be changed.

There are few sentences that I wasn't sure of, like:

Page 71:
白き神々よ・俺の者達を・囲み（かこみ）　神の・手綱（たずな）おかけよ
Divine gods! Surround those standing in front of me with divine reins!
INTERNAL NOTE that's the closes
INTERNAL NOTE I found out that 白き神 means divine interference, 神々 = gods, so the translation "divine gods should be sufficient"
INTERNAL NOTE tazuna - bridle, reins
INTERNAL NOTE jumon wo kakeru - cast a spell

On the page 73 a guard says

姫様……・申し訳あ・りません……・奴ら……・１３年後のように
Princess....
I'm so sorry....
they...
are like those that appeared 13 years ago.

I think that means that Semen summoned more than one monster 13 years ago. Should I make a correction in the 2nd chapter?

This post has been edited by piotr012: Apr 29 2012, 19:14

New bounties:

* translation for Episode 22: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=5684
* translation for Episode 23: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=5685
* translation for Episode 24: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=5686

* editing for Episode 18: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=5687
* editing for Episode 19: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=5688
* editing for Episode 20: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=5689

This post has been edited by Red_Piotrus: Apr 29 2012, 17:44

Here is the translation of (Episode 21) volume 3 chapter 5 of Dragon Pink
[goo.gl] http://goo.gl/RD39t

Im up for editing chapter 18 if its still open.

I have started the translation of chapter 22. I'll do chapter 23 after I am done with 22.