[X] My Assistant

new editing bounties

https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=17961 (SOA)
https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=17963 (FGO)

others are at https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?search=ehcove&t=e&s=

we may get a separate EHCOVE subforum to make organizing stuff a bit easier, I am talking to big boss Ten about stuff

Accepted the bounty for EHCOVe (C88) [Kamogawaya (Kamogawa Tanuki)] Hajime Style (Saki) found here:
https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=17964

Accepting and editing this bounty https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=17961

Completed, sent and published https://e-hentai.org/g/1219406/cecb084c43/

This post has been edited by gansta: May 7 2018, 16:35

Just in case folks are wondering if I've fallen off the edge of the world...nope, I've just been busier than usual.

1st thing is that I've been slowly QC'ing a 226-page comic for Biribiri.... No, he's not an EHCOVE member, but he was the first person to give me work as a QC'er & proofreader 3+ years ago, and even though his demands on my time have lessened considerably of late, I still feel an obligation to help him out from time-to-time.

When I finish Biribiri's job, I'll start on the (Umedama Nabu) Umedamangashuu 3 script...

2nd thing is that Spring has Sprung where I am; and that means a little - or sometimes a lot - less time to devote to proofing/QC'ing. As I mentioned to Red_Piotrus a while ago, during the Summer months I'm lightly-to-heavily engaged in outdoor work(1)... which 'translates' to less time for EHCOVE work.

Yes, I'll still be available for proofing and QC'ing, but turnaround time on projects will be longer and scheduling more erratic(2)...as most of my outdoor workload varies in step with the weather.
I'll probably still check in at least once a day, but I just won't have twelve hours a day to devote to work here.

So...rather than disappear entirely, or drive folks crazy wondering "Where the *&^%$# is PE...!?"(3), I thought it best to be honest and 'fess up.

You folks have a Great Summer...

PE


1) Gardening, landscaping, gardening, vehicle maintenance, grounds-keeping, gardening, drainage work, tree and bush pruning, gardening and a multitude of house-related chores...just to name a few...
2) Well, more erratic than normal...
3) Outside playing in the rain...usually...


This post has been edited by PureEnergy: May 3 2018, 04:38

Good luck whit your summer man. (IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)

Posting the script and claiming the bounty for EHCOVE [Gekka Bijin (Yatogami Shido)] Seija ga Kane wo... (Utawar...)->En 23p. As usual, please let me know if there are any issues with the translation and I'll do my best to correct them.

Have a great summer PE! Don't worry about things here. Go out and enjoy yourself! (IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

EDIT: Corrected several typos caught by PE's proofreading. Thanks! (IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

When a Saint Rings a Bell

pg01

聖者が鐘を鳴らす時
When a Saint Rings a Bell

pg02

聖者が鐘を鳴らす時
When a Saint Rings a Bell

pg03
どうも〜サークル月下美刃の夜刀神　士道です〜ハロハロ〜。
今度はうたもの本ですが、スケールのでかい話だけれども
ちっとも消化してないかもです〜…。
面白いゲームを作ってるリーフ様はすごいっすなぁ。
何だかんだと負けぬようにしたいんですが、
今の俺にはまだまだですよ。

何か出すもの出すもの切羽詰ってるような気がするね。
限られた時間の中で出来る限りの物を作ってるんですが、
周りの人に迷惑掛け捲りです。

それでも楽しんでもらえると感謝のきわみにございまする。
それでは始まり始まり〜。

士道

Thank you! I'm Yatogami Shidou from Circle Gekka Bijin. Hello hello!
This is an Utawarerumono book but it has a really involved story in it.
You may not understand it at all...
The guys who wrote Utawarerumono are really awesome!
I didn't want to publish this book until I'd completely finished but,
I ended up not being able to complete everything I wanted to.

I'm at wits end drawing one page after another.
I did the best I could with the time I had but,
I still had to cut out some of the characters I wanted to put in.

Nevertheless, I'd be very happy to know you still enjoyed this.
Now then, let's begin...

Shidou

pg04

ぱたぱた
*flap flap*

おじさま〜　居る〜？　あれ？
Master~~ Are you here? Huh?

がら〜ん
*clattering*

あら、カミュちゃんどうしたの？
Huh? What's wrong, Kamyu?

ん？
Hmm?

ハクオロさんなら今はお仕事で居ないわよ
If you're looking for Hakuoro, he's not here right now.

そ、そうなの？
Really?

pg05

明後日位じゃないと帰ってこないわよ
He won't be home until the day after tomorrow.

あ、ああじゃあべつにいいや…
Uh, Th- That's OK then. Nevermind.

ふるふる
*shaking head back and forth*

そ…それかっ
W- Well then...

あ…はい
Huh, right.

たた
*hurrying away*

なんだ…今日はおじさま出かけてるんだ…でも私…
Why'd the master have to be out today. I...

何か調子悪いしもしかしたらまた…
I feel strange. I think it might happen again tonight...

pg06

でも…また…あんなこと私　体が勝手にしちゃうの？
If it does, is my body going to just react on its own again?

ヒイイイイイイイ
*moaning*

おじさま早〜い
You came so fast

もやもや
*gloomy*

あんな…こと…
That kind of thing was...

きゃあ〜っ　恥ずかしい〜
Kyaaaa! So embarrassing!

ばたばた
*big commotion*

ぶんぶん
*worried*

ひゃ〜〜
Hyaa...

いくら体が勝手にエッチになちゃったからって…　あんな事まで…
My body got so hot and tingly on its own that time...

おじさま…　ゴメン…
I'm sorry, Master...

pg07

月ノ夜
Evening of the Moon

pg08

今日は満月か…
It's a full moon tonight.

前の時もこんな月の夜だったけ…
It was a night just like this when we did it before.

ほう
*getting horny*

トクントクン
*heartbeat*

あれ？
Huh?

やだ…　もしかして　また…
No way. Is it happening again?

びく
*shake*

ぶる
*shudder*

こんな…の
Was it like this?

びくうびくん
*shake shudder*

や…　
Yah...

は…
Ha...

あ…だめぇ　我慢…で…　出来なく…
Ah, I can't... I can't stop...

はあ　はあ　ふ
Haa Haa Fuu

くにくに
*rubbing fingers*

pg09

あ…すごい…　もう…　こんなになってるよぉ
Ah, wow. I'm already this wet.

んふ　ん　ん
Mmm Mm Mm

ぴく
*shake*

ちゅ　ちゃく　くちゅ
*schlick schlorp*

ビク　ビク
*shake shake*

んぐ…
Mmhk

はぁ…
Haa

あ…はぅ　気持ち…いいよぉ
Ah... it feels so good...

ずちゅ
*schlorp*

ぐちゅ
*schlick*

あ…　は…
Ah... Ha...

あぅ…もっと…もっとぉ…
Ah. More... more...

pg10

あっ…うッ…　ふあぁっ…
Ah... Ugh. Fwahh...

ぶるる
*shaking*

熱くって…　堅いの…
It's so hot and stiff.

欲しい…
I need more.

誰でもいいから
I don't care who from.

もう…
I can't...

はあ〜っ
Haaaa

こんないい夜に見張り番なんてやってらんねえぇよ。
Why'd I have to get picked for guard duty on such a nice night.

おいおい　また隊長に怒られるぞ…
Hey, the watch commander's going to get pissed at you again.

それよりさ…この後一杯やろうぜ
Don't worry about that. Do you want to go get

月見酒かいいねぇ
a drink after this?

ん？
Huh?

じゅりじゅり
*shuffling forward*

す…
*slowly moving forward*

pg11

ぼお〜
*body getting hotter*

はあ　はあ
Haa Haa

か…カミュ様…
M- Miss Kamyu.

ギョッ
*surprise*

どうなさったんですか？　こんな夜更けに
Where are you off to so late at night?

熱いのが…欲しいの…
I need something hot...

はあ　はあ
Haa Haa

ああ、もしかして散歩ですか？今宵はいい月ですし…
Oh, uh. Are you just out for a walk? It's such a nice evening, isn't it?

すっ…
*moving head down to crotch*

ちゅく
*slurp*

じゅん
*smack*

って…か、カミュ様？
Th' Hell? Miss Kamyu?

びく
*shock*

ん…
Mmm

ちゅる　
*suck*

ちゅ
*smack*

ん
Mmm

ふう
*inhale*

pg12

ぺる
*lick*

ちゅる
*suck*

あっ
Ah

くっ
Guh

すごぉい　おっきい
Wow! It's so big!

はむ
*glomp*

か…カミュ様　そんなにしたら…もう…
M- Miss Kamyu. I can't- I'm gonna-

ふう
*breathing noise*

ちゅる
*suck*

ん
Mmm

ふう
*breathing noise*

もう…っでるぅ
I'm gonna cum!

どぷどぷ
*cumming*

びゅくびゅく
*blorp*

はふっ
Haa

あっ…
Ahh

うふふ…早ぁい…　もしかして相当たまってたの？　でもね…
*Giggle* Wow, you came so fast. You must've been saving that up for a long time. But now...

はあ
Haa

カミュがぜ〜んぶ出してあげる
...I want you to give me all the rest of it too.

い…一体どうなさったんですか？
Wh- What's going on?

早いって言われた
She said to come fast...

pg13

へへぇ〜
Heh heh.

ずい
*moving quickly*

次はあなたの番だよぉ〜
It's your turn next!

カミュね…凄く体が熱いの…
My body's getting so hot.

する
*cloth slipping off*

だからね…今度は
So now...

あなたがカミュを気持ち良くして欲しいの…
I want you to make me feel good.

は　はあ
Ha Haa *breathing noises*

ぽたぽた
*dripping wet*

そ…そんな…私めがそんな事は恐れ多…
Th- That's... You can't ask me to...

あせあせ
*total confusion*

い…？
Really?

すっ
*cloth rustling*

んっ…
Mmm

ふっ…
Fuu *breathing noise*

ちゅっ
*smack*

pg14

んッ…　む…
Mmm Mmm

くちゅくちゅ
*smack smack*

ぷはば…
Pwah

はぁ…
Haaa

ねぇ…はやくぅ　カミュもう我慢出来なくなっちゃったよぉ
Come on. Hurry up. I can't wait any more.

はあ
Haa

びっ びり
*ripping top in two*

ヤア…
Yaah

はあ
Haa

わ…わかりましたっ　でもどうなっても知らないですよ。
Y- Yes, miss. What exactly do you want me to do?

やっ…はっ
Yah Hah

ちゅくちゅく
*schlick schlick*

ん…
Mmm

はうっ…
Haa

ああ…深いよぅ
Ahh... they're in so deep.

気持ちいい…
It feels so good.

ちゅぷ　ちゅぐ
*schlick schlorp*

すごいいよぅ…　気持ち…いいのぉ　もっと…もっと…気持ちよくしてぇ
That feels so good. More, more. Give me more.

は
Ha

ああ
Ah

pg15

あっ…　きゃうぅッ
Ah, kyaa!

ぎゅむ
*grab*

ぶくう
*surprise*

びっくりしゃたぁ　いきなりなんだもん
Whoa, you startled me.

へへ…俺も手伝ってあげますよ。
Hehe... Let me give you a hand with that.

はう…
Haa

んっ…
Mmm

きゅむ　きゅっ
*squeezing breasts*

あっ…やぁ　そんな…　乳首そんなぁ
Ah, yah... My nipples are getting so...

は　はあ　ふあ
Ha Haa Fuaa

こっちもすごい濡れ方ですよ？
This is a great way to get you wet, isn't it?

ぐちゅ　ちゅぶ　ちゅく
*schlick schlorp*

ああ…はぅッ　すッ…すごいよぉ
Ahh... Ha... S- So good!

チュッ　クチュッ　チュブッ
*schlick schlorp*

あっ…　は…激しいよぉ…　そんなにしたら…　こ…壊れちゃうぅ
N- Not so rough! You'll break me!

pg16

はぁうッ
Haa

ん…あっ…
Mmm Ah

ぢゅる　ぢゅる
*sloppily wet*

びく
*surprise*

ん…いいよぉ
OK, that's good enough.

やぁ…も…　もう駄目ッ
Ah... I can't wait...

ん…
Mmm

チュッ　チクチュッ　クチュッ
*slap schlurk schlick*

い…入れてぇ　もう…カミュに入れてェッ
Stick it in me! Stick it in me now!

あッ…はぁ…　は…入って来るのぉ　はぁん…ああ…
Ah... Haa... Yes! I need this! Haa... Ah...

はっ　あっ…
Haa Ah...

ズブブッ　　ズブッ　ズブッ
*thrust thrust thrust*

ビク　ビク　ビク
*shaking*

pg17

あ…はぁ　くぅ…
Ah... Ha Kuu...

ブブ　グブ　グブ
*slap slap slap*

いいッ…
So good...

ほら…カミュ様こっちもしてくださいよ
Hey, Miss Kamyu. Do me too.

はあ…　はあ
Haa... Haa

あ…あむ…
Ah Mmm

さっかしたばっかりなのにもう元気ぃ…
You're still so hard after just cumming a minute ago?

ぴちゅ　ちゅく　べちゃ
*suck smack slurp*

あむぅ…　ふうッ…ん　あ…んん…
Mmmm Fuu...n Ah... Mmmm

ズブッ　ズブッ　ズブッ
*hump hump hump*

ぐむ　ぬちゅ
*wet and sloppy*

はぅう…　あぁ…ん
Haa... Aahh...n

ああ…ッ　すッ凄いよぅ　お…奥に…　あたってるのぉ…
Ahh! I can't believe- It's all the way inside...

はう　あっ
Haa... Ahh

ずっ　ずぶっ
*thrust thrust*

びく
*shake*

pg18

あん…　え？
Ahhm... Huh?

ぬぷ
*pushing at asshole*

え？　な…なに？
Wh- What are you doing?

そっちは無理だよ
You can't put it in there!

ずい
*thrusts forward*

ん…っ　はぁぁっ…
Mmm... Haaaa!

ずぶずぶ
*slamming in balls deep*

やぁ　すごっ
Yah! Wow!

びく
*shaking*

ジュププ　ジュプ
*gushing liquid*

あっ…　はぅ…
Ah! Haa!

こ…壊れるのぉ
You're gonna break me!

膣でゴリゴリ擦れるのぉ…ッ
I can feel them both rubbing together inside me!

ぬちゅぬちゅ
*wet thrusting sounds*

pg19

ひゃぁッ…　あん…　んん…くぅ
Hyaa! Ahh.... Mmm...

ずぶずぶ
*thrusting balls deep*

はぁ…っ　あ…あ…
Haa... Ahh...

ぁ…あぁ
Ahh...

むにゅ　むにゅ
*squeezing breasts*

は　はあ
Ha Haa

あっ…
Ah

くう…
Ku

グブブ　グブ　グブ
*balls slapping against body*

ふぁあッんんっ…　んん…
Fwaah... Mmm...

ズブブ　ズブ　ズブ
*continuously thrusting to the hilt*

あぅ…ん
Ahhh

は…
Hah

あん…
Ahh

あッ…　ああ…ん
Ah! Ahhh

びく　びく
*shake shake*

はぁすッ…　すごいよぉ…こんなの初めてェ…
Haa! My first time doing this... I can't believe how amazing it is...

びく　びく
*shake shake*

はぁふぅ…　もっと…良くしてぇ
Haa... More... Give me more!

pg20

ドクドク
*ejaculating forcefully*

んん…っ　やあぁ…ま…　まだ駄目ェ
Mmmm! I can't... It's too late...

お〜い…　交代ぞ〜
Hail! Time to change the guard!

ギイイ
*door creaking open*

って…　こ…これは？
Wh- What the hell?

ドド〜ン
*shock and surprise*

気をつけろよ　族かもしれん…
Watch out! Her species can...

ずっ
*ready to pounce*

pg21

次は…　あんた達の番だよぉ
Now it's your guys' turn!

くすっ
*giggle*

あ〜ッ
AAAHHH!

そしてその後…
Later...

何ぃ…　また昨日も城の兵士達が？
What? You say the castle guards got attacked again last night?

バッ
*anger*

あう〜
Ahhhh

満月の夜には城の兵士を襲って精気を抜く　禍日神が度々現れたりしたという
...that their life-force was sucked out of them and people saw the God of Nugizono there?

終劇
Fin

pg22

漫画の方はいかがだったでしょうか？
初のデジタルでかなりあたふたしましたが
楽しんでいただければいいのですが…。

では次のページはゲストのページとなりますです。
時間がないので、俺のトークはボロボロっす…。

So what did you think, dear readers?
This was my first time going digital, and I had to rush to complete this.
I still hope you enjoyed this though.

The next page features a guest drawing.
I really have to hurry, so I don't have time to say anything more than this...

pg23

あぁ…つたないゲスト原稿で申し訳ないですが
ゆるせ。（命令口調）いや、許してください（笑）
これが残ってるってことは無事発刊できたのだね。
よかった、よかった。
まずは新刊おめでとう。

右の絵ね、アルルゥの
つもりなのだけれども耳が。
耳がね〜…何耳だか
想像もつかなかったので
俺脳内で大耳（ラブ系）
ということで処理しました。
勝手に（笑）

でもアレって本当のトコ
…何耳？（笑）

Ah... I'm sorry this is such a pathetic excuse for a guest piece.
I command you to forgive me! No, I mean... Please forgive me! (lol)
I was actually able to write this with relative ease.
Hurray, hurray!
First, congrats on the new book!

The drawing on the right was supposed to be Aruruu but the ears...
The ears are just... wrong.
I didn't do it deliberately.
My brain just thought they were like that, I guess.
It did it on its own, I swear! (lol)

But the real question is, whose ears are those? (lol)

pg24

どもども今度の本は
どうだったですか？
時間無い也に必死に
やってたんですが、
こんな感じですよ。
次回次回にと言って
おりますご、次こそ
もっといい物を作りたいと
思っております。
それでは次は出れたら
冬コミにてお会い
いたしましょうですよ。
それでは〜

夜刀神　士道

Thank you, thank you. How
was the book this time?
As usual, I didn't have enough time
so I had to rush through it.
I say this every time, but next time
I'll make something even better.
If I can manage to make it there,
I'll be at the Winter Comiket convention.
Let's meet up there and say "Hi"!

Sincerely,

Yatogami Shidou

pg25

聖者が鐘を鳴らす時
When a Saint Rings a Bell

pg26

壱拾ハ歳未満ノ者ノ見ル行為ヲ禁ズ
By decree, patrons not-yet-of-age shall not lay thine eyes upon this tome.

聖者が鐘を鳴らす時
When a Saint Rings a Bell

夜刀神　士道・月下美刃
Yatogami Shidou・Gekka Bijin

This post has been edited by jeddite-eht: May 7 2018, 10:23

EHCOVE [Lezmoe!] 90-nendai! Slayers! Lina Inverse... (Slayers) -> Eng 15p

Translation mostly complete.

As mentioned in a PM, the afterword on page 18 has text obscured by the scanner's logo in the upper-left corner. I have have transcribed the rest of the page and worked out a rough translation, and if we can get a clean copy I can finish and include that as well.

I almost didn't finish in time because I had to rewatch some Slayers to make the character's dialogue more accurate (such as honorifics). I think the series still holds up.

Additional translation notes:
• I translated (笑) as (laugh) instead of (lol), because I'm not a fan of internet slang. If you prefer (lol) in the edited version, go for it.
• 同人誌 was (not) translated to doujinshi or doujin, as the closest English word is probably fanzine, and I think enough people know what a doujinshi is. Same with the word otaku.

Update: Translation improved via feedback from PureEnergy, last updated 05/10/2018.



Page 01

90年代！
The Nineties!

成人向け
For Adults

18歳未満の購入・閲覧禁止
Minors Under 18 are Prohibited from Purchasing or Reading.

スレイヤーズ
Slayers

リナ・インバースと愉快な仲間たち
Lina Inverse and Her Happy Friends


Page 03

リナ＝インバース
Lina Inverse

ご存知ドラまたリナです。
ツンデレ、負乳、最強（笑）、そして主人公というポジション。
超電磁砲の美琴に似ていると思ったのは僕だけでしょうか（＾＾；）
逆に言うと、それくらいしか女主人公の冒険ものって少ないんですよな。
エロ同人誌がほとんどなかったのも、恋愛要素を狙ってなかったからかも（汗）
Known as Lina the Dragon Spooker.
A tsundere, flat-chested, the strongest (laugh), and the position of main character.
I'm the only one who thought that she resembled Mikoto from "A Certain Scientific Railgun." (^^(IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)
On the other hand, there aren't a lot of adventure stories with a female protagonist, are there.
There's almost no erotic doujinshi of her,
probably because there wasn't much of a focus on her romantic side. (sweat)


Page 04

アメリア＝ウィル＝テスラ＝セイルーン
Amelia Wil Tesla Seyruun

元気、正義感、巨乳なのに背が低い（笑）など、
実が唯一無二なくらい、よそでは見ないタイプ。
やんちゃなお姫様がこのポジションで、みんなに敬語使うっていうのも面白いですよね。
やっぱりリナ、ガウリィ、ゼルガディスの４人が揃ってのスレイヤーズだなぁ…と。
Energetic, with a sense of justice; short, with huge breasts (laugh),
she is really unique and a type I don't see anywhere else.
It's interesting that she uses honorifics for everyone,
because of her position as a mischievous princess.
Together with Lina, Gourry and Zelgadis, the four of them together make up Slayers....


Page 05

白蛇のナーガ
Naga the White Serpent

実は主役（笑）更に実はアメリアの…なわけですが、
あえて会わせないという不思議な取り合わせ。
高飛車なお姉さまキャラって、今もツンデレって意味ではいますが、
ちょっとケバくてＳＭチックな衣装はいなくなりましたよね…。
エロ＝ギャグという、ある意味潔い線引きがされていたなぁ…と。
The actual main character (laugh) and the truth is she is Amelia's...
For some reason, they never meet due to a strange set of circumstances.
A domineering, big sister-type character, though now she's a tsundere,
and she doesn't have a slightly-gaudy S&M costume anymore...
There's a sense that she was mainly done as an erotic gag...


Page 06

シルフィール＝ネルス＝ラーダ
Sylphiel Nels Lahda

ファンタジーに必ずいる僧侶の位置にいるのに、準レギュラー的存在だった娘（＾＾；）
彼女が出てくると、お話も後半だなぁ…と思っていた気が。
清楚だから、リナ達の愉快なやりとりに入りにくかったんでしょうか…。
Even though clerics are always in fantasy settings, she only has a semi-regular appearance. (^^(IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)
When she appeared, the story was halfway over... or so I thought.
I guess it was hard to have good interactions with Lina and the others because she was so pure...


Page 07

マルチナ＝ゾアナ＝・メル＝ナブラチロワ
Martina Zoana Mel Navratilova

ＮＥＸＴのオリジナルキャラですね。
きっと当時、大人のヲタクの間でがオリキャラに賛否両論あったんでしょうが、
ガキだった僕は何も思ってませんでした（＾＾；）
悪役ツンデレにふさわしい縦ロール。
でも可愛げのほうが優先されてますよねo（＾－＾）o
ザングルスとくっついたのには驚きましたが（笑）
An original character in Slayers Next.
At the time, I'm sure there were probably pros and cons among the adult otaku
about having an original character, but I was just a kid and didn't think anything about it. (^^(IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)
Her ringlets are suitable for a villainous tsundere.
But her cuteness was given priority. o(^-^)o
I was surprised that she stuck with Zangulus (laugh).


Page 08

フィリア＝ウル＝コプト
Filia Ul Copt

Tryのオリジナルキャラ。
清楚に見えて短気。
加えてドラゴンに変身し、シリアスもゆるキャラもこなすという、
当時の幕ノ内的要素を備えていますよね。
桑島法子さんが、ナデシコの次あたりに見かけたのが
これで、３人組でラジオに出ていたブレイク前を知っている
身としては、うわー売れたんだ！と驚いた記憶があります。
An original character in Slayers Try.
She looks pure and has a short-temper.
In addition to turning into a dragon, she is a serious and cute character...
but doesn't she have elements of Makunouchi (from Hajime no Ippo) from back in those days?
Because I saw this right after Martian Successor Nadesico,
I knew about Houko Kuwashima before her big break on the radio with three other people.
As for myself, there's the surprising memory of "Whoa, she's famous!"


Page 09

エリシエル＝ヴルムグン
Erisiel Vrumugun

誰？なんて言わないで（笑）
通称エリス。
無印でレゾに尽力し、コピーレゾに殺された中ボスです（＾＾；）
スレイヤーズで女性キャラが死ぬのは結構まれだったので、驚きました。
原作とアニメでは設定が違うとか不遇なキャラですが、尽くすいい女でしょね。
"Who?" Don't say that (laugh).
Also known as Eris.
She was a mid-boss that assisted the original Rezo in Slayers, and was killed by Copy Rezo. (^^(IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)
I was surprised, because it's quite rare for a female character to die in Slayers.
Although the original works and anime have different settings and unfortunate characters,
she is a devoted woman.


Page 10

みんな、元気してた？
リナ・インバースよ！
今日は当時全然無かったエロ同人誌だから、超エロエロに暴れちゃうぞ？
Everyone, how have you been?
I'm Lina Inverse!
Since there wasn't any erotic doujin of me back then,
how about we run wild in a super-erotic one today?

ムキィィィ
Spread

ドン
Bam!

くぱぁ…
Gape...

ほら、私のお尻の中とア・ソ・コ！
二度と見せないからありがたいと思いなさいよ！
Look, the inside of my ass and pussy!
It'll never be shown again, so be thankful!


Page 11

リナさ～ん
エッチな本だから全裸なのはいいんですけど…
私達の同人誌ってほんとなかったんですか？
Miss Lina,
It's okay to be naked because this is an erotic book, but...
There really weren't any doujinshi with us?

ドキッ　ドキッ　ドキッ　ドキッ
Badump Badump Badump Badump

私、リナさんと違っておっぱい大きいのに…
Even though I have big boobs, unlike Miss Lina...

なんか言った！？
あの頃はみんなセーラー服美少女戦士ばっかだったのよ！
What did you say!?
They were all nothing but pretty sailor soldiers in those days!

えぇぇぇぇぇ～！
そうなんですか！？
Ehhhhh!
Is that true!?

あと、私とガウリィあんたとゼルがラブラブ過ぎたって
After this, me and Gourry, and you and Zel can have lots of sex!


Page 12

お二人とも…ヒドいです
何も私まで参加させなくても…！
私、ガウリィ様のいない所でこんなイヤらしい姿をさらすなんて…！
Both of you are... so cruel!
Never letting me participate...!
And making me expose myself so shamefully without dear Gourry here...!

プル　プル　プル　プル
Tremble Tremble Tremble Tremble

はぁっ　はぁっ　はぁっ
Haah Haah Haah

シルフィール！
あんたの裸なんて、こういう機会がなきゃ一生見れないでしょ？
Sylphiel!
Isn't this the only chance in a lifetime to see you naked?

あ～あ…アニメでもこれくらいサービスできてればレギュラーだったのに…
Aww... If you had this much fan service,
you would've been a regular character even in the anime...

む…無理です！
あとヒドいです！
No... no way!
That would also be awful!


Page 13

な…なんで私がにっくきリナ・インバースの言う事を聞いてむざむざ全裸に…
W-Why did I listen to the accursed Lina Inverse and get completely naked so easily...

ムニッ　ムニッ　ムニッ　ムニッ
Grope Grope Grope Grope

はぁっ　はぁっ　はぁっ
Haah Haah Haah

プル　プル
Tremble Tremble

あんたなんて数合わせよ　数合わせ
それに　案外やる気まんまんじゃない？
おっぱい揉んで、アソコもお尻の穴もし～っかり見せてくれちゃって
You're just here to make up the numbers, that's all.
Besides, aren't you brimming with unexpected motivation?
Fondle your boobs, and really show off your pussy and asshole!

きぃぃぃぃ！
あとで覚えてなさい！
Kieeee!
I'll get you back for this!


Page 14

リナさん
ほら…見て下さい
Miss Lina, here... please look.

ドンッ
Bam!

パュッ　パュッ　パュッ
Boing Boing Boing

ムニュッ
Grope

くぱァ…
Spread...

…ほんとはドラゴンに変身してる時…
裸だから、その感覚でいるだけなんですけどね
... The truth is, when I transform into a dragon...
Because I'm naked, it feels just like this.

あんたは積極的なのね、フィリア。
そうよ！
堂々としてたほうが恥ずかしくないわ！
これはエロ本なんですもの！
Aren't you assertive, Filia.
That's right!
It's better to be dignified, than embarrassed!
This is an erotic book after all!


Page 15

げっ…あんたもいたの？
Geh... You're here too?

はぁっ　はぁっ　はぁっ
Haah Haah Haah

プルン　プルン
Quiver Quiver

ドン
Bam!

くぱぁ…
Spread...

当たり前よ
レゾ様もこの本をお読みに…
そのためなら、私の裸くらい！
あぁ…レゾ様の赤ちゃんを私のここで…！
Of course!
If Lord Rezo also reads this book...
For that reason, I must be naked!
Ah... Lord Rezo's baby will come from me here...!

ば…バカ！
あいつの子供なんて出来たら大変じゃない！？
A-Are you crazy!
Wouldn't it be disastrous if he could have children!?


Page 16

はぁっ　はぁっ　はぁっ
Haah Haah Haah

あら。
ドラまたリナがそんなサービス無いしで終わっていいわけないでしょ？
Oho!
There's no excuse for finishing without this kind of fan service from Lina the Dragon Spooker,
is there?

じゃあ、ナーガ？
そろそろエンディング決めるわよ！
あんっ！
あんたとこんなこと…な、何でもないわ…
Well, Naga?
The ending will be decided soon!
Anh!
Doing such a thing with you... i-is nothing...!

ムニュッ　ムニュッ
Knead Knead

え？え…？
Eh? Ehh...?


Page 17

はぁっ　はぁっ　はぁっ　はぁっ　はぁっ　はぁっ
Haah Haah Haah Haah Haah Haah

チュプ　チュプ　チュプ
Kiss Kiss Kiss

リナさぁん…
ンチュ…くちゅ…
好きですゥ…
Miss Lina...
Slurp... Slurp...
I love you...

ンンッ…ちゅぷ…
アメリアぁ…
好きよぉ…
Mmm... slurp...
Amelia...
I love you...!

って、何これ！？
一緒にアイドルはやったけどキス…キスって…！
Hey, what's this!?
They were idols together but, k-kissing...!

ピクン　ピクン
Twitch Twitch

クチュ…　クチュ…　クチュ…
Rub... Rub... Rub...


Page 18

あとがき
Afterword

おい！リナの胸ってこんなに大きかったか？
Hey! Were Lina's breasts this big?

言わないほうが身の為だぞ…
You'd better not ask that...

(Missing Text Here.)

※この曲はGive a Reasonだったと思います！
* I think that the song was 'Give a Reason'!

スレイヤーズはですね！
いとこが大ファンでして、しょっちゅう
「ゼロスさんゼロスさん」って言っていた事を思い出します！ｗ
あと、高校の時、国語の時間に自分の好きな歌を流してそれを解説する、
という授業があったんですね。
最初に先生（女性）が「では私の好きな歌を紹介しまーす！」
という訳で流した曲がスレイヤーズの主題歌だったんですよね！
「この曲は、アニメの主題歌なんですが、
普通に聞いてもとっても共感できる良い曲だと思います～」
この先生はヲタクだったのでしょうか…？
仲良くしとけばよかったです！！
That was Slayers!
My cousin was also a big fan, and I remember them always saying, "Mr. Xellos, Mr. Xellos!"
Also, when I was in high school,
there was a lesson in language class where you'd name your favorite song and explain it.
First, the (female) teacher said, "Let me introduce my favorite song!"
and it was the theme song for Slayers!
"Even though this is a theme song from an anime,
I think it's a good song that you can empathize with, just by watching the show."
I wonder if that teacher was an otaku...?
I should have made friends with her!!

買ってくれてありがとう！
Thank you for buying this!

誌名：９０年代！スレイヤーズ！
発行：黒　お湯の香り
サークル：レズ萌え！
印刷所：母淫印刷
発行日：2012年11月30日
※この本は成年向けです！
連絡先aperitif.itou@gmail.com
サイトhttp://rezumoe.o.oo7.jp/r18top.htm
Title: The Nineties! Slayers!
Author: Kuyo Oyu no Kaori
Circle: Lezmoe!
Printer: MILF Printers
Publication Date: November 30, 2012
* This book is for adults!
Contact Address: aperitif.itou@gmail.com
Website: [rezumoe.o.oo7.jp] http://rezumoe.o.oo7.jp/r18top.htm


Page 20

90年代！
The Nineties!

成人向け
For Adults

18歳未満の購入・閲覧禁止
Minors Under 18 are Prohibited from Purchasing or Reading.

スレイヤーズ
Slayers

リナ・インバースと愉快な仲間たち
Lina Inverse and Her Happy Friends


This post has been edited by cdragron: May 10 2018, 14:32

Current Script Status for:
[Tsurikichi Doumei (Umedama Nabu)] Umedamangashuu 3 (Cowboy Bebob)
Translation Bounty Page & #: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=15661
Gallery Page: https://e-hentai.org/g/120748/827dc47dce/
Script Page: https://forums.e-hentai.org/index.php?s=&am...t&p=5139729
Updated Script Page: https://forums.e-hentai.org/index.php?s=&am...t&p=5142872

[STARTED] Proofreading Script May 3rd...
[ONGOING] TL pondering PR comments May 4th...
[FINISHED] Script Updated by Translator illusioninusall on May 5th...


PE

This post has been edited by PureEnergy: May 5 2018, 15:06

V2 Translation for https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=15661

[P50]------------------------------------------------------------

カウボーイビバップハイスクール
Cowboy Bebop High School
高校与太郎哀歌
Lament of a High School Fool
梅玉奈部
Umedama Nabu


[P51]------------------------------------------------------------

はなしてよ
Let me go!
この、何考えてんのよ！
Hey! What do you think you're doing?
おとなしくブツのありかをはくんだな
Be good and spill it on where the loot is.
フン　バカね。何言ってんの？
Huh? Idiot. What are you saying?
とぼけてもムダだぜ
Playing dumb won't work.
しらないわよ知ってたって言わないけどね
I have no idea. Not that I'd tell you either way, of course.
犯すぞこのアマ
I'll rape you, bitch!
最初からそのつもりなんでしょ　やれるもんならやってみなさいよ
You were planning on that from the start! If you're gonna do it, then do it already.
俺は暴力はキライでな
Violence isn't my style.
く薬!?
A...drug?
どうだ効くだろ
How is it? Pretty strong, huh?
自白・・・な・・・んて・・・
A truth...serum...
いいや。自白剤じゃねえよ　媚薬の一種だ
Wrong. It's no truth serum. This is a kind of aphrodisiac.
どこぞで処女が死ぬまでよがり狂ったってゆー一品だぜ
The kind that can make even a virgin fuck herself to death.

(SFX her neck)
プシュッ
psssh


[P52]------------------------------------------------------------

あ・・・あぐ
Aa... ugh.
どうだ　フェイちゃんよ
How is it, Faye?
は・・・
Haa...
は
Ha.
お前好きモノだろ？　やりたくてしょうがねえたろ
You're a slut, right? You can't help but just want to fuck.
ほらどうだ
Well?
あ・・・
Ah...

(SFX top to bottom)
クチュクチュ
Schlick
ハムハム
Bite
キュキュ
Grab
ヂュルヂュル
Slurp


[P53]------------------------------------------------------------

さすがに手慣れてるぜ
Just as I thought, she is used to this.
こいつ・・・
She is...
・・・っつ・・・吸いついて・・・・
...sucking on it...
ーーんぅっ
-hn
ンク　ンク
nh nh.
くふぅ・・・
haa...
ンク
ugh.
ンク・・・んん
guh...nn.
美味しそうに飲んでやがる
It seems like you enjoy swallowing my cum.
・・・んふ
...hmph.

(SFX top to bottom)
クッ　クッ
Ugh Ugh
び　クソ
URK AHH
ドクドクドク
Gushing
ゴクゴク
Swallow
ドロドロ
Drip


[P54]------------------------------------------------------------

ーじゃあ　お待ちかなの挿入だ
Now for the insertion you've been waiting for.
・・・いや・・・
No...
く・・・あ・・・だめ・・・
You can't...
自分でオマンコひろげて何言ってやがる
You're spreading your own cunt. What are you saying now?
あんっ❤
Ahn ❤
あぐっ
Agu
ひあっ
Hyaa
んっ・・・んっ
nh...nh

(SFX top to bottom)
ズ
Slide
プ
Pull
ヂュプヂュプヂュプ
Sliding in and out
クソックソッ
Grab


[P55]------------------------------------------------------------

はっ　はっ
Hah. Hah.
あぅ　あぁん
Aa Aaah.
意外と締まるじゃねえか　使いこんでると思ってたけどな
You're tighter than I expected. I thought you'd be all used up.
ふぁう　あ・・・あひん
Fuh Ah... Hiya.
名器ってやつかも
This is the best pussy I ever fucked. (*)
うっ！
Uu!
あっ　んあん
Ah! Aah!

(SFX top to bottom)
ダプ　ダプ
Smack　Smack
ゼクッゼクッ
Heavy breathing
ビュク　ビュクッ
Spurt Spurt


[P56]------------------------------------------------------------

さて、そろそろ話してもらうか
Now, let's hear you talk.
ブツのありかを
Where's the loot?
あ・・・う　うん・・・
Ah... un unn...
早く・・・早くいれてよ・・・
Hurry... Hurry, put it in...
こりゃ駄目かぁ？　薬の効きすぎか
The drug is too strong. This is no good.
おらぁ
Tell us!
あひっ・・・
HIYAAAA...
どうだこのまま射たれたいかよ
How would you like to be shot right now?
うう・・・う・・・射ってえ・・・あたしの中に　ぶちまけてえぇ
Uuu... uu... Shoot... Shoot it inside of meeeee...
こいつ完全に気が狂ってやがる
This bitch is crazy!

(SFX top to bottom)
チャツ
Shing
ず　ブッ
Slide in
グッ　グッグッ
Argh argh argh


[P57]------------------------------------------------------------

しょうがねえ　もう少し楽しむか
Oh well. I guess I will have some more fun with her.
きゅう
Kyuu.
くあっ
Kya.
こっちはパイズリな
I'll give her tits a fuck.
あっ　あひっ　くぅぅんっ
Ah Ahi Kuuun.
ケツの方が感じるのかね
Seems like she's more into anal.
はひ・・・あ・・・あふ・・・
Hahi... Aa... Ahu...
この女薬がなくてもきっとこうだぜ
I bet she is this much of a whore even without the drug.

(SFX top to bottom)
ギュギュ　ム
Squeeze
にゅ　ルッ
Thrust
クッ
Argh
キュキュ
Tighten
ゲラゲラゲラ
Ha ha ha


[P58]------------------------------------------------------------

あんっ　あんっ
Ah Ah
ああー
Aa-

(SFX top to bottom)
ニュム　ニュム
Spurt
ビクッ　ビクッ
Tremble
ビュッ
Spurt


[P59]------------------------------------------------------------

ああ
Aa
んあっ・・・
Ahh...

(SFX)
ビュッ　ビュッ
squirt squirt


[P60]------------------------------------------------------------

気絶かよ　まだはかせてねーのにな
Did she faint? She hasn't told us anything yet.
まあいいだろ　時間はあるからな　たっぷりと
No rush. There is still plenty of time.
なんだそりゃ
What's that?
知らねえの?　この仏像　こいつが元で宗教団体が血で血を洗う抗争をしたってゆー品だぜ
You don't know? This Buddha statue caused a bloody dispute in the religious group.
この仏像で武装仏僧が物騒だったってね (*)
You could say those Buddhists had some beef with each other.
フェイのブツだよねー (**)
That is Faye's loot.


-----------------------------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------------------------

↓ Notes. Don't edit this onto pages.

P55 * Not sure how to explain 名器 in a short sentence. It is praise for her pussy.
P60 * Tongue twister; likely he is lying to tell this joke. I can't translate it so I made something up.
P60 ** Pun with ブツ meaning both Buddha and (stolen) loot. Not sure how to explain the joke within the text so I left it out. I want to avoid giving notes on the side to readers.

Credits go to anonymous.

Please feel free to PM me about mistakes or just to give advice or anything at all...

Accepting the editing bounty for EHCOVE [Gekka Bijin (Yatogami Shido)] Seija ga Kane wo... (Utawar...)->edit 23p

found at https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=17984

[Edit 5/11/18] All pages cleaned. 11/23 pages typeset.
[Edit 5/15/18] All pages complete. Ready for review. Here's the link: [www.mediafire.com] http://www.mediafire.com/file/pixi2t3ee6qo55b/Typeset.zip
[Edit 6/1/18] Adjusted from feedback. New link: [www.mediafire.com] http://www.mediafire.com/file/pixi2t3ee6qo...ypeset.zip/file

This post has been edited by jford360: Jun 1 2018, 20:23

Current Script Status for:
EHCOVE (Heartful Communication) [Gekka Bijin (Yatogami Shido)] Seija ga Kane o Narasu Toki (Utawarerumono)
Translation Bounty Page & #: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=13668
Translator's Forum Script Post: https://forums.e-hentai.org/index.php?s=&am...t&p=5141463

[STARTED] Proofreading Script May 6th...
[ONGOING] TL pondering PR comments May 6th...
[FINISHED] Script Updated by Translator jeddite-eht May 7th...

PE

This post has been edited by PureEnergy: May 7 2018, 22:23

Current Script Status for:
EHCOVE [Lezmoe!] 90-nendai! Slayers! Lina Inverse... (Slayers)
Translation Bounty Page & #: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=14967
Gallery Page: https://e-hentai.org/g/622271/b2cb3fa9b9/
Script Page: https://forums.e-hentai.org/index.php?s=&am...t&p=5141765

[STARTED] Proofreading Script May 6th...
[ONGOING] TL pondering PR comments May 8th...
[FINISHED] Script Updated by Translator cdragron May 10th...

PE

This post has been edited by PureEnergy: May 11 2018, 05:25

Posting script and claiming bounty for EHCOVe (C88) [Kamogawaya (Kamogawa Tanuki)] Hajime Style (Saki)

It's my first bounty so if you notice any issues please let me know.


-- p2 --
暑い・・・
It's so hot...

うわぁ アイスだ・・・
Ah a popsicle stand...

-- p3 --
うわぁー
Wow
ミルクにイチゴ・・・
They have milk, strawberry...
ソーダに抹茶・・・
soda, green tea...
いろんな種類がある
they really do have bunch of flavors.

どれも美味しそうだなぁ・・・
They all look good...

どれも１５０円だけどお嬢ちゃんお金持ってるのかい？
They're all 150 yen but do you have any money with you?

あー・・・・・・
Aah...

まぁいいやアイス食べたいんだよね？
Oh well, you wanted one right?

-- p4 --
ほ・・・ホントにアイスくれるんだよね？
Will you really give me one?

あげるよぉ約束だからね
Of course, I promise.
でもアイス食べるならお腹を壊さないように
But if you're having a popsicle, first we need to warm your body up

まずは身体を温めないとだねぇ
so that your stomach doesn't start to hurt.

-- p5 --

おじさん・・・ボクくすぐったいよ
Mister... It tickles.

どうだい？気持ちいいだろう？
How is it? It feels good doesn't it?
今度はこっちにお尻同けるんだ
This time, point your butt towards me.

うん・・・
Okay...
こ・・・こう？
li...like this?

-- p6 --
お嬢ちゃんの中そごく気持ちよくておじさんイキそうだ
Your insides feel so good, I'm about to cum.

ぼ・・・ぼくも・・・っ
M... Me too..
いっ・・・イクっ・・・
I'm... cumming...

-- p7 --
Hな事もしたしアイスももらったけど
Even though I did lewd things and got given a popsicle,
なんだか満たされない気分
I don't really feel satisfied.

-- p8 --
お待ちになって国広一さん
Please wait, Kunihiro Hajime-san.

This post has been edited by xalbitr: May 9 2018, 14:45

A few comments about https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=17964.
They're not necessarily issues, but some suggestions that I think could make your script better.

-- p2 --
うわぁ アイスだ・・・
Ah a popsicle stand...

"Ah! A popsicle stand..."

-- p3 --
うわぁー
Wow
ミルクにイチゴ・・・
They have milk, strawberry...
ソーダに抹茶・・・
soda, green tea...
いろんな種類がある
they really do have bunch of flavors.

A few comments on this line:
- you should use proper punctuation and capital letters in your translations,
- that's all in a single bubble, so you don't have to translate each line separately (it will usually make the translation sound better too),
- "soda" is not a flavor (some words that make sense in Japanese do not necessarily make sense in English),
- the use of "do" in "they really do have a bunch of flavors" does not make much sense in my opinion.
Suggestion: "Wow! Milk, strawberry, lemonade, green tea... There are so many different flavors!"

どれも１５０円だけどお嬢ちゃんお金持ってるのかい？
They're all 150 yen but do you have any money with you?

Maybe you could be a bit more creative here: "They cost 150 yen each, but you don't seem to have brought your wallet with you..." (I think it sounds a bit better).

あー・・・・・・
Aah...

"Oh, right..."

まぁいいやアイス食べたいんだよね？
Oh well, you wanted one right?

Here again, you can be a bit more creative, as long as your translation conveys the same meaning: "You want one right? I'm sure we can find a deal."

-- p4 --
ほ・・・ホントにアイスくれるんだよね？
Will you really give me one?

"W-Will you really give me one?"

でもアイス食べるならお腹を壊さないように
But if you're having a popsicle, first we need to warm your body up

まずは身体を温めないとだねぇ
so that your stomach doesn't start to hurt.

"But if you're gonna have a popsicle, [...] so that you don't hurt your stomach."

-- p5 --

Missing the translation of moans. They may not seem important to you, but to someone who cannot read Japanese, untranslated moans can completely break the immersion.

おじさん・・・ボクくすぐったいよ
Mister... It tickles.

I'd use an exclamation mark here to make the sentence more lively: "Mister... It tickles!"

どうだい？気持ちいいだろう？
How is it? It feels good doesn't it?

By asking "How is it?", he's actually indirectly asking "Do you like it?". The English language is more direct in this case (and in many cases), so he should ask "Do you like it?"

今度はこっちにお尻同けるんだ
This time, point your butt towards me.

"Now show me your butt."

こ・・・こう？
li...like this?

Personal preference (and I think it's more standard): use dashes instead of ellipses when stuttering in the middle of a word (there should also be capitals at "like", since this is the start of a new sentence): "L-Like this?"

Untranslated moans.

-- p6 --

Untranslated moans.

-- p7 --

Untranslated moans.

Hな事もしたしアイスももらったけど
Even though I did lewd things and got given a popsicle,
なんだか満たされない気分
I don't really feel satisfied.

"got given" -> sounds wrong. I wouldn't start the sentence with "even though", because the first part sounds positive in Japanese until "けど". Also, I think you can translate "Hな事" by "sex" here, there's no reason to use "lewd things" (it's a bit more than just "lewd things", and she doesn't seem to be shy about it, so she has no reason not to call it sex).
"I had sex and even got a popsicle, but... / I still feel empty inside..."

A few comments about https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=17964.
They're not necessarily issues, but some suggestions that I think could make your script better.

Thanks for the detailed feedback, it helped me to notice a couple of mistakes I was making repeatedly. I'll go back and fix them up now.

Not really sure how I ended up missing the moans on pages 5, 6, and 7 but thanks for pointing them out.

I started editing this one
https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=18010.

V2 translation for https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=17964 incorporating changes based on suggestions from KirbyDances and PureEnergy.

-- p2 --
暑い・・・
It's so hot...
うわぁ アイスだ・・・
Ah! A popsicle stand...

SFX (right to left, top to bottom)
ミーンミーンミーン
cicada cry

Signs:
アイスキャンデー
Popsicles

-- p3 --
うわぁー ミルクにイチゴ・・・ソーダに抹茶・・・いろんな種類がある
Wow! They have milk, strawberry, lemonade, green tea... There are so many different flavors!
どれも美味しそうだなぁ・・・
They all look good...
どれも１５０円だけどお嬢ちゃんお金持ってるのかい？
They cost 150 yen each, but you don't seem to have your purse with you...
あー・・・・・・
Oh, right...
まぁいいやアイス食べたいんだよね？
You want one, right? I'm sure we can work something out.

sfx(right to left, top to bottom)
ミーンミーン
cicada cry
ドキッ
ba-thump
プルン
wobble/quiver
ズイッ
slip
ニヤァ
grin

-- p4 --
ほ・・・ホントにアイスくれるんだよね？
W-Will you really give me one?
あげるよぉ約束だからね
Of course, I promise.
でもアイス食べるならお腹を壊さないようにまずは身体を温めないとだねぇ
But if you're gonna have a popsicle, first we need to warm your body up
so that you don't hurt your tummy.

sfx(right to left, top to bottom)
ドキ
ba-thump
キュッ♡
*gentle squeeze*
ドキ
ba-thump
ペチャッ ピチャッ
slurp slurp
ビクンッ
twitch
ムニュッ
grope
ピクンッ
twitch
moans:
はぁ
haa
んはっ
nhah
あんっ
ahn

-- p5 --
おじさん・・・ボクくすぐったいよ
Mister... It tickles!
どうだい？気持ちいいだろう？
Do you like it? It feels good doesn't it?
今度はこっちにお尻同けるんだ
Now show me your butt.
うん・・・
Okay...
こ・・・こう？
Li... Like this?

SFX:
ビクッ ビクッ ビクンッ
twitch twitch twitch
ジュルッ
drool
チュプッ
smooch
ガタッ
rattle
ビクンッ
twitch
ズププッ
thrust
プルンッ
wobble/quiver
ズッ
slide
ビビクンッ
twitch

Moans:
あっ
ah
はあっ
haah
ああんっ
aahn

-- p6 --
お嬢ちゃんの中そごく気持ちよくておじさんイキそうだ
Your insides feel so good, I'm about to cum.

ぼ・・・ぼくも・・・っ
M... Me too...
いっ・・・イクっ・・・
I'm... cumming...

SFX:
ズッ
slide
ジュポッ
jupok (wet thrusting sound)
ズチュッ
shmuk (wet smacking sound)
ズプッ
thrust

Moans:
あっ
ah
ああっ　あっ
aah ah

-- p7 --
Hな事もしたしアイスももらったけど
I had sex and even got given a popsicle, but...
なんだか満たされない気分
I still feel empty inside

SFX:
ビクンッ
twitch
ビュルッ
spurt
ドクッ
gush
ドピュッ
spurt
ピチャッ
lick

Moans:
あっ
ah
ああん
aahn

-- p8 --
お待ちになって国広一さん
Please wait, Kunihiro Hajime-san.

This post has been edited by xalbitr: May 12 2018, 03:54

There's a few things here I'd like to comment on...mainly because many translators are liable to get the impression that "English as she is spoke" is always a very 'correct' language'...
No. Nope. Nada. No ways. Unless the speakers are in a scientific, business, political or other 'upper-crust' environment, the 'every-day', 'commonplace' American English they speak will be so 'sloppy' as to be almost unintelligible.
And it changes, sometimes radically, depending on age, physical condition, mood, situation and surroundings. An upset ten-year-old does not talk like a sixty-year-old Professor of English...!
Furthermore - unless someone is having a bad hair day, or is trying to upset people - most people never even notice mistakes and little irregularities in speech...

- "soda" is not a flavor (some words that make sense in Japanese do not necessarily make sense in English),

Ah, neither is "milk'...

- the use of "do" in "they really do have a bunch of flavors" does not make much sense in my opinion.

I wouldn't even have read that twice, as the word "do" is perfectly acceptable if the speaker is emphasizing a point. People do do that, you know... (IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

By asking "How is it?", he's actually indirectly asking "Do you like it?". The English language is more direct in this case (and in many cases), so he should ask "Do you like it?"

Ah..depends...if the situation is very casual and 'unconcerned', than asking "How is it?" would be normal...

Personal preference (and I think it's more standard): use dashes instead of ellipses when stuttering in the middle of a word (there should also be capitals at "like", since this is the start of a new sentence): "L-Like this?"

Ah, this may be one of my little foibles, but I've always assumed that the artist/writer knew what (s)he was doing when it comes to punctuation(though translators do seem to leave off a lot of periods.)
In this instance - because of the ellipses and the space - I'd assume it was probably a 'hesitant' pronunciation of the word, not a stutter...ellipses do not convey the 'feeling' of a staccato sound...
"Li... Like this?" I read as a hesitation... "Li-Like this?" as a stutter...

"got given" -> sounds wrong.

True..."was given" is correct...

I wouldn't start the sentence with "even though", because the first part sounds positive in Japanese until "けど".

Again, I would have considered the sentence Ok... English sentence structure is 'peculiar' in that sentences can be written in such a way as to 'set up' a certain... 'anticipation', in the mind of the reader...but the 'fulfillment' of that 'anticipation' is at the end of the sentence...
So, the sentence: "Even though I did lewd things and was given a popsicle, I don't really feel satisfied."
let's the reader know 'ahead of time' that "lewd things" and a "popsickle" weren't enough...
The only thing I would have changed - aside from "got" - is the "don't really" word order, as American English would be: "really don't"...

On 2nd Thought: "even got given" fits her character and 'mental ability' perfectly....

PE

This post has been edited by PureEnergy: May 11 2018, 23:38

Current Script Status for:
EHCOVe (C88) [Kamogawaya (Kamogawa Tanuki)] Hajime Style (Saki)
Translation Bounty Page & #: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=17964
Gallery Page: https://e-hentai.org/g/930298/f0d9cf4c76/
Updated Script Page(Version 2): https://forums.e-hentai.org/index.php?s=&am...t&p=5148187

[STARTED] Proofreading Script May 11th...
[ONGOING] TL pondering PR comments May 11th...
[FINISHED] Script Updated by Translator xalbitr on May 11th...

PE

This post has been edited by PureEnergy: May 13 2018, 00:33

Accepted the bounty for EHCOVE [SEM;COLON (Mitsu King)] Rinri Code: Dai 2 Sou (Sword Art Online)