[X] My Assistant

As described here: [www.dailymail.co.uk] http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-20...Tube-video.html and in 200 other news outlets around the world.
Here's a set of links relatively closest to the events, with information unaltered by reporters:

Local news outlet feed: [www.kztv10.com] http://www.kztv10.com/full-coverage/video-...ghter/#fcanchor
Daughter's twitter: [twitter.com] http://twitter.com/#!/shoeofallcosmos
Mother's statement: [www.facebook.com] https://www.facebook.com/halliegean?sk=wall
Judge's golden thoughts from his cases: [cashadvancecomplaints.com] http://cashadvancecomplaints.com/2011/09/3...ad-of-his-time/

1. The fact that the daughter has/had cerebral palsy, which caused many news outlets to describe her as 'disabled' is practically irrelevant. It led to her being more interested in Internet and downloading stuff, that's all.

2. The video itself. It's a very instructive example of child abuse. It probably resonated with so many people, many more than all the news about war here and there, because people can relate very well to the experience. It showed many people that have never experienced such events in their lives how it may look like, and how it may feel like, and made them understand better the lives of people whose whole childhood passed under such a dark cloud on the horizon, and treading lightly to avoid being hit at random moment. It shows very well the buildup of anger in the parent, sentences full of emotion from an intelligent man, deliberately chosen to deliver harm. It shows he is not using violence as a last resort, to teach the girl anything, but instead to assert his dominance, and to dissipate his own anger, possibly built up over unrelated events. It shows his inability to discuss, to reason and to persuade, astonishing in a judge. It shows his belief that his values are the right ones, and to disagree is to attack him. It shows he doesn't think of himself of protector of a child he brought to the world, as a last resort against all the rest of the world, as a person who would always support the girl, but as protector of his values even if they mean pain for his family. People with weekly outbursts of anger should not be qualified to have a family - it happens, but the more people know this is bad and they should seek help, the better.

I hope it also shows to thousands of those who presently lead such lives that in eyes of the world it's not an average, normal childhood, and perhaps the change for the better which they can't even imagine, not having ever experienced it, is possible.

3. It's useful to realize that child abuse is, on example of this event - emotionally:

- worse than getting mugged in a dark alley, because the mugger isn't your last resort, the person to depend upon and can't get away from. Also because you are not in danger of getting mugged in a dark alley daily.

- not much better, or worse, than being subject to rape or torture. Actually, the harm depends mostly on the duration of event - actual actions that lead to pain in rape or torture rarely take much time, just like in the video, while being captive of a rapist or in power of people who torture you can take weeks or years, much like entire life of constant child abuse.

- actual bodily harm from such event is largely irrelevant, as you can imagine an accident that would leave you in some much or worse pain, but if it was clear to you that it was an accident, you would have no negative connotations of it. It's the situation you are put in, and you have to live through, that matters.

- it's also worse than events that might come about in war, as the war may put a soldier against a soldier, as a big mechanism of events no one can control, but when the world around is at peace, and hell is restricted to within the family, it's hard to blame the fate for what happens.

I think this video might teach a lot of people more about the world of others than many fat books would ever we able to.

4. The metaphor. A long time ago he got angry, and expressed it in his actions. Now the Internet made it possible for the big chunk of the world to see the event, and to judge him. He'd better shut up, lie quietly down and fear the blow, as it might come to him unexpectedly, not governed by reason but emotion, from any quarter. Protesting loudly or trying any violence is very dangerous, at least until the world's anger dissipates. All his past mistakes are brought back under the spotlight. And the anger can come back... at any time.

5. The practical result. This guy is a judge. He specializes in child abuse cases. He repeatedly ruled that evidence from the child is not to be believed - see the last link. Complaints about his judgements that have piled up for years were not effective. This shows how little insight the judicial system has on its own judges, and gives hope that with more such recorded evidence the bad apples will learn, or be thrown out of positions of authority quickly.

6. Heh, I have lived in such a world for my entire childhood, and my father has changed much since then... too bad he only started reasoning about the world at the age of 40, and I don't think I can ever make him understand why me or my brother don't want to stay in his vicinity for a prolonged time ever again in our lives, so he won't be surrounded by happy family in his old age. It may be tough for the person he is now, but he worked hard for this.

-snip-

3. It's useful to realize that child abuse is, on example of this event - emotionally:

- worse than getting mugged in a dark alley, because the mugger isn't your last resort, the person to depend upon and can't get away from. Also because you are not in danger of getting mugged in a dark alley daily.

- not much better, or worse, than being subject to rape or torture. Actually, the harm depends mostly on the duration of event - actual actions that lead to pain in rape or torture rarely take much time, just like in the video, while being captive of a rapist or in power of people who torture you can take weeks or years, much like entire life of constant child abuse.

- actual bodily harm from such event is largely irrelevant, as you can imagine an accident that would leave you in some much or worse pain, but if it was clear to you that it was an accident, you would have no negative connotations of it. It's the situation you are put in, and you have to live through, that matters.

- it's also worse than events that might come about in war, as the war may put a soldier against a soldier, as a big mechanism of events no one can control, but when the world around is at peace, and hell is restricted to within the family, it's hard to blame the fate for what happens.

I think this video might teach a lot of people more about the world of others than many fat books would ever we able to.

4. The metaphor. A long time ago he got angry, and expressed it in his actions. Now the Internet made it possible for the big chunk of the world to see the event, and to judge him. He'd better shut up, lie quietly down and fear the blow, as it might come to him unexpectedly, not governed by reason but emotion, from any quarter. Protesting loudly or trying any violence is very dangerous, at least until the world's anger dissipates. All his past mistakes are brought back under the spotlight. And the anger can come back... at any time.

5. The practical result. This guy is a judge. He specializes in child abuse cases. He repeatedly ruled that evidence from the child is not to be believed - see the last link. Complaints about his judgements that have piled up for years were not effective. This shows how little insight the judicial system has on its own judges, and gives hope that with more such recorded evidence the bad apples will learn, or be thrown out of positions of authority quickly.

6. Heh, I have lived in such a world for my entire childhood, and my father has changed much since then... too bad he only started reasoning about the world at the age of 40, and I don't think I can ever make him understand why me or my brother don't want to stay in his vicinity for a prolonged time ever again in our lives, so he won't be surrounded by happy family in his old age. It may be tough for the person he is now, but he worked hard for this.

The world is a dark malicious place. People not fit to be parents often become one and those who desire it are seldom given the chance.

-Point 3;
As a victim of child abuse, I agree with point number 3. When the crime is in the confides of your "home" it is lingering. If you are mugged or worse on a particular route, neighborhood or street you can choose to avoid that area altogether. You can never avoid going home, only delay it.

-Point 4;
As a judge if he goes to jail he will die. No ifs, maybes or buts, it is as good as a death sentence. He doesn't deserve death, as death is a GOOD thing. But the fear of impending death which is what he will get, that is totally justified.

-Point 5;
The court system has always been heavily flawed ever since it relied on humans. People abuse the courts on a daily basis. If you know the rules to the game then play. Corrupt 'insert civil servant here' are not uncommon. People raise the roof whenever one hits the headlines but the fanfare soon dies down. History repeats itself.

-Point 6;
I too had an abusive dad who was also a rapist and child molester. I also had a mother who let it happen. They are getting old now, and they will die alone reaping what they sowed. But is that punishment for the crimes they inflicted on us? No, not really. We, as victims have to move forward with our lives while all they have to do is beg for forgiveness and proclaim how sorry they are. But they are not, they seldom are.

Some of the people who frequent these forums have molested or abused children, some are extremely ridden with guilt for their actions whilst I imagine others just don't give a shit and will carry on regardless. The ones who are drawn to suicide or depression for their actions, those are the ones who can begin to understand (or already do) the damage they have inflicted. For them and their victims their is at least hope that together they can put the crimes of the past behind them and both build a new, better life moving forward. Those who just don't give a shit? Death is too good, torture only goes so far, so what do you do? At least in the case of this judge he will get a sliver of punishment he deserves.

Edit:
Today is a fine day...TO BE A JUDGE!
Judge convicted of battering his wife because she hadn't cooked his dinner is sacked

Read more: [www.dailymail.co.uk] http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-20...l#ixzz1ce7HN470

This post has been edited by tokendood: Nov 3 2011, 14:48

My parents were pretty violent towards me as a child.

At school I had to explain weird bruises, etc...

I remember 1 time my mum beat me with a piece of polythene pipe and I ended up in the emergency room.

2 days after that I broke her wrist, I grabbed it when she went to slap me in the face.

It's kinda weird now. I still talk to my mum, we have a pretty normal relationship. She regrets doing all that horrible shit to me.

I regret pulling a knife on her and making her beg for her life.

Now we put all that shit behind us.

She was left with 2 kids she had to raise by herself.

I was probably one of the worst behaved kids in history.

I understand why she got angry.

She also understands why I got homicidal.

So we just leave it in the past. Yes, it fucked me up, but she did the best she could do with what she had.

Life doesn't always turn out the way you want.

I love my mum, she isn't perfect by any means, but she tries, and that's what matters.

My father won't come anywhere near me in a physical contest.

I nearly killed him the last time. He ain't taking that risk again.

If he does, it will kill him.

I guarantee it.

Wait a minute, I just realized this is the serious debate forums. I stay out of here for a reason, so I deleted my comment.

This post has been edited by Pseudoshy: Nov 3 2011, 17:46

Five words: None of your fucking business.

Give into the attention whoring of this girl if you want to. Now that we live in an age where everything, and I mean everything, gets onto the internet, be it "good" or "bad," you're going to have snooping, nosy, ignorant fucking people doing their damnedest to get way too excitable about stuff they shouldn't honestly be concerned about.

Consider this: Do we know if she actually has cerebral palsy, or was it just an act, is it a lie? Are you going to accept this as the truth simply because you read it, or are there solid facts that support this claim?

Consider this: Do we know what she did for punishment? Did it require severe, extended discipline or not? Any information we read on this is surely going to have a bias where, no, it did not, but we live in an age where spanking is considered abuse, if you recall.

Consider this: Was she screaming more than she should have been? Was she being loud because she knew it was being recorded? Was she being apprehensive and insubordinate because she knew it was being recorded? Was she acting because she knew it could be taken out of context and plastered around the internet and other media outlets and she could fuck with her parents?

Seems folks dropped their skepticism because they heard a few things that tugged on their heartstrings and made it a sympathetic Cinderella story.

The world may have people that actually do this kind of stuff to people far worse off than this girl, yet we pay attention to the ones that have the ability to record this stuff, put it on their fucking computer and upload it onto the internet before we even bother with the ones that can't, because, since this one is forced into your face with all the bullshit that goes along with it, the others are theoretical? Sure, I guess.

But consider this: This one is also theoretical since I doubt any of that was true on the part of the girl.

This video looks so painfully familiar to me... my stepdad used to do the same things to me when I was a kid (and for similarly stupid reasons excuses). I fucking hate that guy now, I can't see his fucking face anymore.
It frustrates me that the only thing I can do for her is post a friendly comment on her user page, along with the rest of the world. :|

This post has been edited by Lolicon_of_Sin: Nov 3 2011, 22:08

Now that we live in an age where everything, and I mean everything, gets onto the internet, be it "good" or "bad," you're going to have snooping, nosy, ignorant fucking people doing their damnedest to get way too excitable about stuff they shouldn't honestly be concerned about.

I think a big part of the appeal of this stuff was that it resonated with events from people's own lives, and not so much whether it was presented in Cinderella-like fashion or not. Even if the video was completely fake, with actors, it would still have good effect on people imo. So, if it helps people come to terms with their own lives, it's a good thing they're concerned about this stuff.

So what do the bleeding hearts suggest for one's options if their children are being shitty? Sometimes smacking them upside their stupid fucking heads is the only option.

Parents aren't allowed to have any control over their children. You're not supposed to spank them, that's physical abuse. You're not supposed to yell at them, that's mental abuse. You're not allowed to isolate them, that's emotional abuse.

What options do you have?

If this kind of stuff becomes commonplace, then I guess we'll just eventually go back to some kind of ridiculous feral state.

It's important to find out if this is dramatized in any way, because it sets a dangerous precedent. If the public accepts this without any proof, any credence or anything resembling a logical approach to the situation, then what's to stop other kids from doing the same thing? And if that works, it's going to become more prevalent. So when does it stop?

When are parents supposed to be the moral compass? When are parents supposed to discipline their shitty offspring?

Parents are there to lead, to guide and, unfortunately, they are there to hold control over their children up to a certain point. They aren't there to be buddies, or pals, or friends with them.

And another thing to consider: What if this was an isolated incident? Did anyone think of that? If this happened all the time, this wouldn't be the first point we would have heard about it considering the severity.

An addition to this, she made this recording to show why he shouldn't be a judge in their town.

Re-read that and see if it doesn't seem petty or antagonistic.

In my case, the similar coarse "education" my stepdad gave me led to me hating him for the rest of my life and I've grown to become the complete opposite of what he wanted to make of me. Instead of obeying him, I began to fear him intensively, and eventually I began to rebel, I sometimes locked myself up in my room and refused to go to school, and other shit like that.
When I grew older, it had become even worse, I was sick and tired of his violence and disrespect towards me and I began to strike back; it often happened that I picked fights with him, I once even threw my chair at his face and, to my great pleasure, it left a real ugly wound on his face because of it. Eventually it even led me to become violent towards other people too (if it would've carried on, maybe even my own children later?).

So there, I had a very bad youth because of that pig, I was growing up to become a rebellious, violent guy, that is until our relation became so extremely ill and violent that I made him leave this house forever.
Then my mother "re-educated" me, kindly; if she wanted something from me, she asked in a friendly way, I always obeyed, and now I am a healthy, sympathic guy who's the completely opposite of the hateful rage-a-holic I used to be (*). I now still love her and (now that she's very ill) I'm glad to help her whenever she's in need of something.

I believe physical violence towards children for the sake of control and education is medieval and it does not work. Au contraire.



(*= at least in real life, cough)

This post has been edited by Lolicon_of_Sin: Nov 4 2011, 00:44

In my case, the similar coarse "education" my stepdad gave me led to me hating him for the rest of my life and I've grown to become the complete opposite of what he wanted to make of me. Instead of obeying him, I began to fear him intensively, and eventually I began to rebel, I sometimes locked myself up in my room and refused to go to school, and other shit like that.
When I grew older, it had become even worse, I was sick and tired of his violence and disrespect towards me and I began to strike back; it often happened that I picked fights with him, I once even threw my chair at his face and, to my great pleasure, it left a real ugly wound on his face because of it. Eventually it even led me to become violent towards other people too (if it would've carried on, maybe even my own children later?).

So there, I had a very bad youth because of that pig, I was growing up to become a rebellious, violent guy, that is until our relation became so extremely ill and violent that I made him leave this house forever.
Then my mother "re-educated" me, kindly; if she wanted something from me, she asked in a friendly way, I always obeyed, and now I am a healthy, sympathic guy who's the completely opposite of the hateful rage-a-holic I used to be (*).

I believe physical violence towards children for the sake of control and education is medieval and it does not work. Au contraire.
(*= at least in real life, cough)

That's what Dlaglacz was talking about, since this video hits close to home to you, you immediately side with the victim and don't see some of the other facts about the situation, like how the girl has been blackmailing his father with this video for 7 years, getting her things like a Mercedes Benz and cellphones and stuff, only to finally release it when it was convenient. In reality, probably both sides share some of the fault, and both will end up losing in this situation(judge will lose his job, girl won't be able to depend on her dad's money anymore)

And that's completely fair. Parent abuses child, child abuses parent. Like I did.

EDIT: No, fair is not the word I'm looking for. "Logical" would fit better.

This post has been edited by Lolicon_of_Sin: Nov 4 2011, 01:13

I believe physical violence towards children for the sake of control and education is medieval and it does not work. Au contraire.

Then again, you forget that not everyone is wired the same way. Different people respond to different input.

It didn't work for you, but some of the absolutely deviant, awful children I've seen don't really regard "Oh, please stop screaming." with anything more than ignorance.

You forget, clearly, that there is a line between discipline and abuse.

So equating all discipline with abuse is equally as ignorant as all the snot nosed brats being obnoxious, rude and puerile in public. And most of these obnoxious, rude and puerile children often grow up to be the same when they come of age without any direction placed on them, be it physical or otherwise.

To be frank, this clearly wasn't abuse. It's painfully obvious, and buying into the thought that it was just shows how easily everyone is willing to take any information at face value. This was discipline pure and simple. Dramatized far too much. But discipline nonetheless.

Those weren't screams of pain and they weren't screams of terror. If you're in enough pain to scream that loudly, your brain isn't able to articulate the words you want to say until it's over. And terror and pain don't overlap, so if that was terror, her body language is all fucking wrong, and I don't buy the Palsy.

If you're really buying into this, then that's too bad. But looking at this from a viewpoint of behavioral analysis shows just how much of a show it was.

Fair. But clearly it didn't work for her either. If she began to blackmail her dad because of his "discipline", use it against him, it is revenge and it means it clearly didn't work.
Violence should always be avoided until there's really nothing else left besides psychiatry.
(and even then, you're likely to make your child violent or abusive in any way too)

This post has been edited by Lolicon_of_Sin: Nov 4 2011, 01:04

Frankly, most people don't know how to raise children properly. Many of them try to raise their children the way they were raised. I do not believe that in the vast majority of cases, physical violence is necessary. If it is necessary, generally speaking, that means the parent is not a good parent, able to use a blunt tool because they don't know how to use finer ones. Humanity is not a bunch of children any more to be so clumsy. Behaviorism, reward-response theory, conditioning works. It absolutely works. Yes, you can get results by using physical reprimands and negative feedback (which is also conditioning) but it is not necessary and creates fear, uncertainty, and complexes.

A child is completely dependent on the parents in the first years of their lives. For most, eventually the world becomes a bigger influence but who had the guiding grip from the beginning? Parents. They set the foundational blocks for their children. Genetics only guidelines predispositions not actual behavior. Like the saying goes, a child is bad because the parenting is bad in some sense or the other, even if due to unavoidable circumstances. I mislike the way you seem to blame children so easily, as if they were already rational adults who have a completed mind and act with a complete will.

I do not like the use of any physical remonstrance. I don't think its necessary in the vast majority of cases if the parent is capable. Of course, many parents aren't, so physicality is their easiest recourse that might actually work (for a while).

-Vakuen

This post has been edited by Vakuen: Nov 4 2011, 02:25

So, let me get this straight. You assume discipline is a negative thing because it makes the child feel bad?

Going off myself as an example, and not as if I were some sort of be-all, end-all rule, but when something makes me feel bad or hurt or whatever, I typically don't do it again. And that's kind of the point. That's how it worked when I was a kid, on the rare times when I would act up and be a shitbag and my parents gave me a whipping. I would stop because I didn't want to have that happen to me again. Take away my video games? I didn't care, because I was clever enough to find ways to get them back and put them away again before they got home from work. Put me in my room? I'd go to sleep or play with my toys because I didn't care about the outdoors because by that point I had no interest in the outdoors. Those finer tools didn't work because they were ineffective. I don't like getting hurt, but I like figuring things out, and they provided me with puzzles to work out.

I'm not going to treat my children like some kind of behavioral experiment. I'm not going to give them a snack whenever they do something right or take away their ball when they do something wrong because they're not a fucking dog.

Humans are creatures of reason, no matter the age, and treating them like some kind of lower life form that can't understand simple things is just absolutely disrespectful. Not to mention naive. Of course you can't exclusively use negative reinforcement because in most cases it begets rebellion which creates a violent child, and you can't exclusively use positive reinforcement because in most cases it puts the parent in a light of being a pushover and in no position of control which creates an entitled child. You have to use a balance of the two, otherwise you're a goddamned idiot and should be punched in the fucking throat.

This post has been edited by radixius sparkle: Nov 4 2011, 03:13

Well, I agree with that. If words really don't work, I think it's okay to use some threatening, or a slap on the cheek that generates more sound than pain. If you constantly use violence however (such as my stepdad), your kid's very likely to go rebelling, overreact, fight back, or take revenge anyhow, and that's when you should know you're doing it very wrong.

So, then, why take this video out of context and assume that this was his first reaction?

I don't know anything about the whole history and the girl's situation, but...

If you constantly use violence however (such as my stepdad), your kid's very likely to go rebelling, overreact, fight back, or take revenge anyhow, and that's when you should know you're doing it very wrong.

... which she did, so this seems most likely to me. I reacted from experience; but then again, she might just have a really evil character too.

I found the whole thing amusing.

It's like Youtubers haven't seen someone being whipped before in their entire life. I even stumbled across the most RIDICULOUS comment I had ever seen.

Basically, one of the viewers said that even if your kid burns down the house, or break windows in your car, you should NEVER whoop them... Ever.

I also liked how the girl in the video turned around when the mom asked her to, but not when the dad told her to. She kept being rebellious to the father making the beating worse. It's almost like everybody from Youtube never seen someone get hit with a belt before.

Let's not forget the whole reason WHY she got whipped. She was basically stealing games and music from the internet after being told many times to discontinue the act. I for one thinks she deserved the belt whipping.

I fail to see the reason why having cerebral palsy would lead her to become fond with technology. She seemed perfectly fine in the video, just putting on an act in front of the camera.

"Go get my belt. Go get the big ONE...."

The lowest rated comments in that first link were the most logical ones. People nowadays are stupid. Damn parents don't know what's best for their kids. If a kid does something very bad or very dangerous, you gotta make sure they don't do it again. There's no guarantees, but it's better than nothing. You get a better response from a child with a kind word and a smack than just a kind word.