[X] My Assistant

I know what we should do: we should set the minimum age of this forum to be 18+, much like one would do for pornographic sites, and assume everyone inside would be mature enough to take a joke. Oh, wait...

We don't understand the plight of other races...

Oh, wait...

So dere I was, the wise guy chilling wid da Big Cheese himself, a hard-boiled lounge lizard, in his jalopy wid some swell hooch straight from the speakeasy when dis hotsy-totsy broad walks by wid a pair of gams on her so spiffy dey gave me da heebie-jeebies but da sheik is totally stuck on the swanky sheba and I can tell dat he wants to make whoopee wid da dame because it's clear by the way he's carrying a torch for her like some sorta drugstore cowboy so he tells me to go and scram while he takes the keen lass for a ride and me being da pushover I am I walk out to get to a gin mill to get myself some more giggle water and I end up punching this ossified bluenose in the kisser when he tries to high-hat me with a line because nobody treats my mama's son like dat and go get piss-drunk with a ritzy hoofer at da joint till I upchuck some and decide to go back to da car but when I do da boss be gone and all dat's left is the dumb dora's body and I guess da darb bumped her off or something and dere's a crowd starting to gather and I tell them to spread out but none of them listen and soon the coppas are pinching me and I'm trying to tell them, horsefeathers and applesauce officas you're all wet, I'm soitenly being framed for dis moll's murder but dey throw me in da slamma anyhow and dat's how I became a fall guy on a flat tire and ain't dat just da fuckin' cat's meow.

JESUS FUCK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME I DON'T HAVE TIME TO BE WASTING ON A MEDIOCRE SENTENCE MY GOD BLORG GET A LIFE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH THIS FUCKING RAIN AND SHIT.

Also, it's "soitenly" not "soitently" according to Google.

So dere I was, the wise guy chilling wid da Big Cheese himself, a hard-boiled lounge lizard, in his jalopy wid some swell hooch straight from the speakeasy when dis hotsy-totsy broad walks by wid a pair of gams on her so spiffy dey gave me da heebie-jeebies but da sheik is totally stuck on the swanky sheba and I can tell dat he wants to make whoopee wid da dame because it's clear by the way he's carrying a torch for her like some sorta drugstore cowboy so he tells me to go and scram while he takes the keen lass for a ride and me being da pushover I am I walk out to get to a gin mill to get myself some more giggle water and I end up punching this ossified bluenose in the kisser when he tries to high-hat me with a line because nobody treats my mama's son like dat and go get piss-drunk with a ritzy hoofer at da joint till I upchuck some and decide to go back to da car but when I do da boss be gone and all dat's left is the dumb dora's body and I guess da darb bumped her off or something and dere's a crowd starting to gather and I tell them to spread out but none of them listen and soon the coppas are pinching me and I'm trying to tell them, horsefeathers and applesauce officas you're all wet, I'm soitenly being framed for dis moll's murder but dey throw me in da slamma anyhow and dat's how I became a fall guy on a flat tire and ain't dat just da fuckin' cat's meow.

JESUS FUCK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME I DON'T HAVE TIME TO BE WASTING ON A MEDIOCRE SENTENCE MY GOD BLORG GET A LIFE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH THIS FUCKING RAIN AND SHIT.

Also, it's "soitenly" not "soitently" according to Google.

Good sir, you are most certainly not a rapper, but rather a gentleman of fine form*. Were I a woman, I would go to Korea and marry you. As I am a man, it seems we must wed in Canada.

* Best compliment I can give.

Cube steak is the best steak there is.

Fuck yo couch nigga. Ribeye is where it's at.

Who cares as long as it's a pound of hot, juicy meat?

This post has been edited by Benjiro: Jun 23 2011, 06:16

according to Google.

And thus the source of the discrepancy has been located.

Edit:
Wait, soitenly? That's not a whole other word, it's just a screwy way to say "certainly."

This post has been edited by FourThirteen: Jun 23 2011, 07:00

Read: Previous page.

Sorry, I don't understand how saying 'certainly' with Curly Joe's accent counts as slang.

"I'm a victim of soicumstance."

I also don't understand how saying "shit" with Snoop Dogg's accent counts as slang, but when someone tells me the shizzle's in the fizzle I believe them.

I also don't understand how saying "shit" with Snoop Dogg's accent counts as slang, but when someone tells me the shizzle's in the fizzle I believe them.

It's not an accent, or slang. He's hiiiiigh.

Next you'll be telling me dawg isn't slang but just dog said in a drawling voice.

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh

I am... I don't even know what to say... what the heck was all that o.o?
Still interesting though, it helped me expand my lame english vocabulary atleast a bit

streetfelineblue, open up your whore mouth and take my massive...KARMA LOAD OF THE HEAVENLY DRILL!

bOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAh!

Was it as good for you as it was for me? Now get your clothes back on and piss off while I go home and tell my wife how much I love her and the kids.

I'll call you when I need you.

bOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAh!

Is this the onomatopoeia of ejaculating now?

Goddammit. I just woke up four different times, each time I was dreaming about my family coming in and dropping a scaner the size of a 1tb EHD and an Avril Levine CD on my legs. Each time I looked at them, the first time taking out the scanner and it disappears. The second time it''s the avril Levine one. The third time I wise up to this sick and twisted dream world, and the fourth time I go to my dad, who is downstairs for some reason and tell him about this and we go to my old room and then WE disappear!

And then I wake up, my family is actually here, no cd or scanner, and I go downstairs in a rush to tell my dad what happen and, barring my desperation and confusion about what I know were dreams, we had the exact same conversation as in the dream.

NlGGER is just "hare" with a drawl. And hare is a mispronunciation of "hare" in Spanish (read néhgro), meaning black. Everything is a mispronunciation of everything else, really, dawg*.


* Woof, woof.

Just need twenty-thousand more karma+ for another tick.

This post has been edited by kingwolf: Jun 27 2011, 09:30