[X] My Assistant

Copy that.

But right now, I just started another bounty(of mikol's) so I'll check it after I finish that.

desworks is still inactive; one month is enough

I declare IIIc editing bounty: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=10583 open to all takers

as a reminder, deswork did the first 28 pages (https://www.mediafire.com/?qh2d3dhj74h8pdo). Some proofreading comments on how to make them better are at https://forums.e-hentai.org/index.php?s=&am...t&p=3318639 . About 12 pages remain.

This post has been edited by Red_Piotrus: Jul 23 2014, 05:25

desworks is still inactive; one month is enough

I declare IIIc editing bounty: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=10583 open to all takers

as a reminder, deswork did the first 28 pages (https://www.mediafire.com/?qh2d3dhj74h8pdo). Some proofreading comments on how to make them better are at https://forums.e-hentai.org/index.php?s=&am...t&p=3318639 . About 12 pages remain.

OK, I'll start working on this then.
But I won't use previous editor's work because those 28 pages are in jpeg so editing text on it are equally to do it from scratch anyway.

I'm working on something and it's hard and taking pretty much all the spare time I have, and I feel like my interest in this is procrastination, but it's a fact that 3c and d are probably my favourite out of the series, and I really want to see them done too. If it stalls again and there are no takers I'll drop everything to typeset it. I'm as new as new can get at this though.

desworks is still inactive; one month is enough

I declare IIIc editing bounty: https://e-hentai.org/bounty.php?bid=10583 open to all takers

as a reminder, deswork did the first 28 pages (https://www.mediafire.com/?qh2d3dhj74h8pdo). Some proofreading comments on how to make them better are at https://forums.e-hentai.org/index.php?s=&am...t&p=3318639 . About 12 pages remain.

New editor, finally.

Guess I should use shorter words, especially translating vertical writings in up-down long bubbles.(Like embarrassing -> shame) And that 'too drunken' thing should be changed to 'get too drunken' or 'drank too much'. (Actually I didn't get what's wrong when I saw it in first time. (IMG:[invalid] style_emoticons/default/rolleyes.gif) )

This post has been edited by asdkg: Jul 24 2014, 03:45

@asdkg

Can you check this page?
https://e-hentai.org/s/0afba2e181/147946-32 (page 32)
Top left box, it seems to be missing.

Also, a few small white bubbles in 1st panel of page 34.

Thanks.

This post has been edited by zam005: Jul 24 2014, 19:11

@asdkg

Can you check this page?
https://e-hentai.org/s/0afba2e181/147946-32 (page 32)
Top left box, it seems to be missing.

Also, a few small white bubbles in 1st panel of page 34.

Thanks.

Oh... I'm really sorry.

The box in page 32 is 'This is the worst place"



Those 5 words in 3 white bubbles are all panting sound, 'HA (はぁ、はっ、はあ)'. So it's like

== *PANT*... / *PANT*-...

== *PANT* / *PANT*...

== *PANT-"...♡


Or

== Haahh... / Haahh-...

== Haah / Haaah...

== Haahh-...♡

I prefer the second one but it can make readers think that Skuld is laughing, I guess.

Personally I really hate to put *SFX* form in bubble (it looks so awkward to me...) but I have no option in most case. There's too many onomatopoeia in Japanese.

Thanks.

Also, I prefer the second one too. That's what most Hentai used anyway.

I needs your help!

Well, actually not a big deal lol

I have two versions of MOVIE STAR IIIc which me and red are in dilemma to choose.

1) a little small fonts but good texts shape.
[www.mediafire.com] http://www.mediafire.com/download/sbxtut7ab2ry5cd/[EHCOVE]_MOVIE_STAR_IIIc.rar

2) bigger fonts, easier to read but packed bubbles.
[www.mediafire.com] http://www.mediafire.com/download/51pe17pr38xj45f/[EHCOVE]_MOVIE_STAR_IIIc_ver2.rar

Let me know what do you guys think.

Thanks in advance.

IIIc is ready for release as soon as we can decide which of those is better... I guess we could release them both, too.

I'll go with first one. I do have some proofreading comments that I'll be adding here... soon.

SM's proofing notes are here: [www.sendspace.com] https://www.sendspace.com/file/wf5qt9

I think they may be well worth discussing and incorporating into the script.

The one with bigger fonts looks good to me, because it's easier to read.

And I think I should fix the script based on SM's note, because I can't proofread this well enough. But there's some parts that need to be discussed.

Page 7.

(Bubble, Skuld thinking)
He's just a middle-aged man. Seeing him now...
I'm a little worried
<Seeing him now makes me a bit worried>
===> It's like... Skuld thought he was some kind of sex monster when she first saw him DOING Berdandy, but now she realized that he is just ordinary man, seeing him in his office now.
So I suggest “He looks like just a mid-aged man now. I think it’s alright.”


(Bubble, Skuld thinking)
Looks w,weeeeird...but he doesn't looks... violent...
<He looks weeeird… but he doesn’t seem like the violent type>
===> ”He looks w,weird… but he doesn’t seem like the violent type”
Because Skuld is stammering because she’s embarrassed, not saying ‘He’s really weird’




Page 8.

He-y! A girl has come... looks like a... princess-!
===> Oh humanity I made translation error in here. '見たい(Mi Ta I)' can be both 'look like' and 'want to see' and I thought it means 'look like'. So I thought that sentence means 'A girl, who looks like princess, has came' but it's actually 'Someone wants to see our princess'.
So it should be 'He-y! Someone just came to meet our princess!"





Page 9.
(Bubble, M)
Are you telling me to stop even though we are enjoying it this much
It's so cheeky
===> 'Are you telling me to stop when I'm at the height of love? Nonsense!'

(Bubble, M)
We've been up there in heaven so many times together but you treat me so coldly
===> Guess I did it too literally. '天国に乗る(go up to the heaven)' means 'cum'.
So it can be 'We have made love for so many times but you treat me so coldly'

(3 Pink bubbles)
Gyu*Pu Gyu*Pu
===> I found the exact word. It's *QUEEF*

(Box)
She says words that I cannot believe I hear
When she got wet...
===> She got totally wet and says nasty words.
I can't believe that she says such a things.




Page 12
(Bubble, S)
Looks like they're having fun but... again?
===> Looks like they're having fun but... doing it again?


Page 22
1st frame, top right
(Bubble, M)
You look even cuter when you're undoing the buttons(*)
===> Cute girl looks even cuter when she's undoing the buttons


Page 30
(Box)
I certainly became frank... and daring
===> Changing 'Frank' into 'Honest', as SM suggested.


Page 32
(Bubble, S)
You're Mr.pervert...
===> Original Japanese is 'へんたいさん(HenTaI-San)’ So I had some options like 'hentai-san', 'pervert-san', or 'Mr.pervert' and I chose 'Mr.Pervert' because Skuld have called the man 'Mister'(='おじいさん(OJiI-San)



Page 35

(Box)
Two genitals are joining together
They rub each other and
Stick to each other
...I tried hard to give as good as I got but
(I didn’t get it…)
===> Two genitals are combined(or 'linked') with each other.
They rub each other
and they cling(or 'stick') to each other.
I tried my best to keep my senses but...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'll wait until you guys come into conclusion then.
Not native English speaker here. Can't help with this stuff.
I'll come to check here again later.

Oh, I forgot to say that personally I would go for choice 1 too.

This post has been edited by zam005: Jul 31 2014, 16:43

Not a native speaker either. English isn't also my main language. Since I don't know Japanese, I didn't reword most of the dialogue. Doing so will add more workload for the both of you, anyway.

@asdkg - Thanks for correcting.

This post has been edited by Ser Maggot: Jul 31 2014, 23:51

Me neither.

And I really appreciate your help, SM. Unfortunately I won't be able to use my PC for about a week so I'll post new script after that.

I think I am quite good at rewording things into English, despite not being a native speaker neither, but I know no Japanese. Let me know if you want to see my version of any sentences.

@Red

Sure, why not give it a try?

But it would be nice if you could use Ser Maggot's proofed doc and put your rewording sentences there after his, with different color. It will make things less confusing for me.

Ok, here's my version - my proposed/endorsed changes are in yellow

[www.mediafire.com] https://www.mediafire.com/?sufv1wcg8cpsgli

I get back to my home much earlier than I thought. Here's full script, amended based on SM and RED's notes.

Page 6.

1st frame, top
(Three boxes on the top)
So many people I don't know
Somewhere I don't know where
on the street I don't know

...And, that makes me unhappy

2nd frame, middle-up left
(Single box on the Middle left)
Beautiful theorems and formulas make me happy because I 'KNOW' them

3rd frame, middle-down left
(4 bubbles, two girls talking)

It can't be
BUT IT’S TRUE

I heard that-
he said she's his niece

Real-ly?
4th frame, bottom
(Box)
...Did you know?

(Box)
What I came here for?
*******************************************************************************


Page 7.

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, Man)
Well, well, well… Where should we begin?

(Bubble, Skuld thinking)
He's just a middle-aged man. Seeing him now...
I'm a little worried
Seeing him now makes me a bit less worried

(SFX in the Yellow bubble)
It's "Kiyo To" and it's word for shaking one's head to say 'No' or 'I don't know'.

2nd frame, top left
(Bubble, M)
Oh dear dear
Oh dear, I was too drunk to notice last night but...

Looking now and I see that you're so adorable
You really are adorable.

(Bubble, M)
I am lucky that I get to show you off to my colleagues

(Bubble, Skuld thinking)
He looks weeeird… but he doesn’t seem like the violent type

3rd frame, middle-up left
(Bubble M)
If you say or do something that embarrasses me
You do know why we came here, right? It’s because of the promise we made.

4th frame ,middle-down left
(Bubble, M)
I'll be really pleased.
(Bubble, Skuld)
Aaaaaagh(Kiya Ak)
Huh!?



5th frame, bottom
(Bubble, Man)
It...It's too loud!
You-you’re too loud!

(Box)
He doesn't look like a bad man but

(Bubble, S)
It’s because you suddenly surprised me!

(Bubble, S)
I, is it really alright to take me in a place like this!?

(Bubble, M)
Probably
Anyway, why don't we start the immoral lesson?

(The last box)
...I can't say he's gentle

*****************************************************************************



Page 8.

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, S)
...This is the place
where big sister called me from...

(Box)
...Yesterday...

(Box between two bubbles)
...I don't
want to go in here...
2nd frame, top left
(Box)
I made up my mind, Knocked on the door and Opened it up and, just as I expected...

(yellow bubble)
U*Wa(SFX for being surprised)

(Bubble, S)
AhaAh!
Naked...
Big sister,
Called me from hotel,
And... and...
(Bubble, M)
Oh... right
I see I see
He-y! Someone just came to meet our princess!
I really don’t know what’s happening(Small fonts on the left)

3rd frame, middle left
(Box)
Yes... Big sister was there

4th frame, Middle
(Box)
Being groped by a man

(Bubble, Verdandi)
So... you came here, huh?

(Bubble, V)
It's O.K. Don't be bothered with... this

5th frame, bottom
(Box)
She saw me came in but... she never... It was like she was enjoying it...

(Bubble, V)
Wait... for a while...
I have something to tell you after this.

(Man saying)
Hey Hey Hey
What do you mean 'after this'?
Don't be hard on me

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 9.

1st frame, top
(Bubble, M)
Are you telling me to stop when I'm at the height of passion? Nonsense!

(Bubble, M)
Ah...♡
I'm... sorry
I'm just...

(Box)
I could see it right away, that big sister was completely wet

(Bubble, M)
We have made love for so many times but you still treat me so coldly

(Box)
She used to be shy but
at that time
she was talking desperately

(Bubble, V)
Ah♡
That's... right
Move..it
Please Move...it♡

2nd frame, middle right
(Pink bubble, lowest on the frame)
Pi*Ku*Pi*k (SFX for twitch)

4th frame, middle

(Bubble, V)
Ca...Can you see...!?
Look... It's
It's like...Sleipnir♡

(3 Pink bubbles)
Gyu*Pu Gyu*Pu
(SFX for a... squeep? I saw that on South Park(Episode about Canadian women) but I can't remember exact word. Anyway it's for the sound made when penis goes into vagina and air inside is squeezed and pass through the very narrow space between penis and vagina. Like fart.)
QUEEF

(Box)
I can't believe that she says such things when she is aroused


(Bubble, V)
He's the only one...
that keeps it up
no matter how many times I do it!!

(Box)
She sounds sexy even to me so
To the men, it's...

(Bubble, V)
I can't remember how many times he came anymore...
It's carrying me away...
W,what should...I do

5th frame, bottom right
(Bubble, M)
You said It's like Sleipnir's?
Then I should do it like a horse!

(Bubble, V)
Yes...
So squirt it...♡
To me...♡

(Box)
She's so weak to being scolded because she's so submissive
Driven skillfully to a corner, and with no way to escape
...then she easily falls into a role of a sub


(Bubble, M)
So you wanna have my seed, huh?
What a horny mare

(Bubble, V)
Aha...♡
Seed... you mean... sperm
Then, then this is a copulation...♡

(Box)
Maybe she wasn't able to resist
His manipulative skill

6th frame, bottom left
(Bubble, V)
Give it to me again please...

(Box)
She's responding with nothing but her instinct.
Just like an animal...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 10.

First frame in top right
(Box)
I don't know when that feeling has emerged...

(Box)
But I think that restriction of being a 'Goddess' has triggered it.

(Bubble, Skuld thinking)
They're not the people I saw in clubroom
(Bubble, Skuld thinking)
Doesn't looks bad but...

(The words(遠い目), not in the bubble, neither box)
Looking elsewhere...

2nd frame, big one on the top left)

(Bubble, V)
They introduced to me... the people in the clubroom
It's not that long since we started getting along but...

(Bubble, V)
Look, they're so experienced and...
treat me like a little girl and...

(Box)
Big sister got wet
lying with her legs opened shamelessly...

(Box)
Her figure, innocently exposing her naked body in front of other people,
was like a that of a pet obeying its owner...

(Yellow bubble around you know)
Hi-Ku-N
Hi-Ku-Hi (SFX for twitch)

3rd and 4th frame, middle
(Box)
...By the way
Big sister's genitals look special even to me

They are soft and innocent and adorable...

(Box)
Slightly opened lips are so vulnerable and shy

But, now they are is disgraced, loose and obscene more than any others

(Box)
It's drooling its juice, sticky and stringy...

4th Frame on the bottom right)
(Bubble, V)
We talked about many things and it drifted to things about you(*)...!
(*Skuld, in original sentence)

(Bubble, V)
Look, you said that it's too stuffy staying inside all the time, right...?

5th Frame on the bottom left)
(Bubble, V)
So I talked about it and he said he would take care of you

(Not in the bubble, neither box)
...What?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 11

First frame, on the top

(Bubble, V)
He'll teach you many things from tomorrow...

(Box)
I don't want to hear
I don't want to hear
such a thing...!

(Bubble, V)
Don't forget your job and don't trouble other people.

I talked with Mr.Hasegawa so... don't worry

(Box)
It... It's obvious that he's going to do THINGS that he couldn't do in the clubroom...
2nd frame, from middle right and down to bottom left)
(Bubble, V)
It's alright... You know that I've always cared about you...

Don't be shy... just go and see it...

(Box)
So this PARTY is a reward for them… for taking care of Skuld

3rd frame, middle left)
(Bubble, V)
Everyone, it's my younger sister please take good care of her

(Box)
...Big sister looks pleased, and she introduced me to others so... I don't want to say it but...

4rd fream, bottom left
(Box)
SLEIPNIR!!

(Box)
It can't be...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 12

First frame, on the top right
(Box)
...So, this is the story about why I came with this Sleipnir guy, to his office

(Bubble, Skuld)
Huh...? Is it? I'm not sure...

(Box)
He just doesn't stop chattering, and it's little amusing... He is good with words
2nd frame, top middle
(Bubble, S)
He doesn't look that bad, seeing him after I calmed down
Except telling me some boring jokes

(Box)
No wonder. It's my big sister... She never makes mistake in important things...
3rd frame, top left
(Bubble, Man)
And, it's like
I was in my car, in the middle of the street and...

(Bubble, S)
R,Really?

(Box)
This wide-open personality... it's like Urd

That's the reason why I can talk with him without hurting my feelings...

(Bubble, Man)
I got it recorded
4th frame, bottom
(Box)
And before I knew it, we started to watch his special tape.

(Bubble, S)
Wwwwwwwwwwwhat!?

Wa...Wa Wait...!

Is this... wait, is that O.K.!?

(Bubble, S)
Nooooooh It can't be it can't be-

(Box)
...deceived by temptation...
5th frame, bottom right
(Box)
Meanwhile, he left to prepare for a meeting so I watched it alone

(Box)
...I see the girl, looks younger than me, is doing THINGS and my brain shuts down.

(Bubble, S)
Looks like they're having fun but... doing it again?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page13

First frame, on the top right

(Bubble, Man)
Are you O.K?

(Bubble, Man)
Oh, you look even more adorable when blushing

(Bubble, Skuld thinking)
It catches my eyes...
I can't stop watching his... THERE...

(Box)
I'm totally carried away by this weird feeling
2nd frame, on the top middle

(Bubble, S)
F...feels like
I am the only one... doing something... shameful...

(Bubble, M)
Would it please you if I get naked, then?
I'm ready in anytime.

(Bubble, S)
Huh!
3rd frame, on the top-half of page

(Box)
The air just got hot
Before I figure out what to say...!

(Bubble, Man)
Let's see Let's see...
You can show it to me just a little bit can't you?

Well Well
You're wearing a cute underwear.
4th frame, on the bottom right
(Bubble, Man)
How about this?
I hope you like this

(Box)
The voice suddenly reaches to my ears...

It's...!
5th frame, on the bottom left
(Bubble, S)
Big sister!?

(Box)
Heavy breathing...
Dirty conversation...
It's the one from yesterday!

(Box)
Her vivid, wet voice sets this amorous air on fire...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 14

First frame, on the top right
(Bubble, M)
You're a mysterious girl
You don't look like you are used to this but
You don't look afraid of it either

(Bubble, M)
Tickle, Tickle

(Pink Bubble)
Tsu...(SFX for touching or rubbing something softly)

(Box)
Thick, and huge finger...

It moves so skillfully that makes me confused

2nd frame, left to the 1st one
(Bubble, M)
Oh, Oh?
You're making strange voice

(Pink Bubble)
*Tap* *Tap*

(Pink Bubble)
*Push*(or *Press*)

(Box)
He pokes my sensitive PLACE
With subtle intensity...
3rd frame, top left
(Box)
Little fire lights inside me... it starts to melt my body slowly

(Bubble, S)
Why do I... feel...

(Box)
Slightly warm breath has leaked from me and... It is caught in my nose and I can hear myself making coquettish noises...

4th frame(Or the 3rd, cuz they're not seperated by actual line)
(Bubble, Man)
So this is the one, right?
The thing that you keep staring at.

Alright Then, let me help you.

(Box)
He slowly takes down his pants in front of me...

(Bubble, Skuld thinking)
Why... (am I taking my panties off) by myself...
Aah, dear...
What am I... doing...

(Pink bubble, right on the Skuld's panty)
*Slide*

(Box)
It's just like yesterday...
Just like when he was doing it with big sister...!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 15

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, S)
No...h...

(Bubble, Man)
Dear Dear...
I guess you forgot it, even though it was just yesterday.

(Bubble, Man)
What would you do, cute young lady?

(Box)
Like a sly conjurer...
not showing what he got in his hand
He lures me, skillfully,
He's driving me...

2nd frame, top left
(Bubble, S Thinking)
I...It's a penis... ... definitely...

(Bubbles, S thinking)
Aghhhhh
I've never seen...
o, one like this...


(Box)
Sleipnir...!

(Box)
Dense and with an unusual smell...
Feels like my nose is getting numb and...
It absorbs my attention at once...

3rd frame, bottom right
(Box)
My head is spinning... faster... and faster...

(Bubble, M)
Look, it’s not as shameful now that we both took off our underwear, right?

(Box)
...I nodded
3rd frame, bottom left
(Box)
leisurely...
He teases me

(2 Pink bubbles)
*Poke* *Poke*

(Box)
He touches and fondles me and slowly...

like something crawling
little by little
it slides into me...

(2 pink bubbles)
*splash* *splash*(Or *sloppy*)

(Box)
His thick finger is searching for the secrets of my inner place...!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 16

1st frame, top right
(3 Pink bubbles)
*Splash* X3 (Same as the ones on the page 15)

(Bubble, Man)
Good Good, It’s starting to make a wet sound

You're pretty sensitive
2nd frame, top middle
(Box)
A chill breaks out on my skin, makes me shiver...
And it runs to my finger tip

I can feel the heat gathering up in my shivering body...
3rd frame, top left
(Bubble, S)
T, this is... great...
I'm surprised...

I've never, seen...
such a... thing

(Box)
My eyes must be moist... and filled with lust... more than ever...

4th frame, bottom right
(Box)
Big sister's drowsy voice flooded into my ears and...

(Box)
It triggered, my...

(Box)
He’s watching me, as if he’s testing me…
that’s getting anxious…

(Box)
Not his but my breath gets faster, and louder...

(Box)
Cannot resist this atmosphere, anymore...!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 17

1st frame, top
(Box)
Just like... Just like (her, or yesterday)]
I will be...

2nd frame., middle right
(Bubble, M)
Oh, drat
Time for the meeting

(Bubble, M)
Sorry but we should save the fun for later.

3rd frame, the biggest one
(Bubble, S)
Ah...

(Bubble, S)
No...
No...

(Bubble...)
I'm...
Look...

(Box)
Then I found myself...
shivering so hard that I couldn't stop it by myself...

(Box)
My body desires...
Urges grow stronger...
Like a broken engine...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Page 18

1st frame, top right, with nothing but one bubble
(Bubble, S)
Er... look...

2nd frame, top
(Box)
We left his office this afternoon and bought lunchboxes.

(Box)
We walked through the downtown
...Going down this way it's...

(Bubble, S)
Where could we eat this?
3rd frame, bottom right
(Bubble, S)
.......oh
Noooo.....h
4th frame, bottom left
(Bubble, M)
It will be the a huge trouble problem if my co-workers saw us.
Come on, come on

(Box)
We walk through the entrance, leaving behind the passengers raising their eyebrows .

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Page 19

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, V)
...That's right
in the other word
...mating...

something like that...
It doesn't matter how you call it.


2nd frame, top left
(Box)
...suddenly

(Box)
The things that big sister told me has came across crossed my mind.

(Bubble, V)
You must be confused if I tell you that you should be ashamed at first.
But Skuld, I think it would be good for you because you may learn something through this...

(Bubble, V)
Sometimes you take things too seriously...

3rd frame(Or 4th), bottom right
(Bubble, V)
I think it's good to do something following your feelings

(Bubble, V)
It's very pleasing

4th frame, bottom left
(Box)
...This is the place for nothing but DOING IT

(Box)
Now, I just take a step into this room and...

(Pink bubble)
*Gulp*
(Swallowing one's saliva because of anxiety)

(Box)
It would be a step forward in my life...

(Bubble, M)
Well, then
come here...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 20

1st frame, on the top
(Box)
Under the cheap lamp...!

(2 Pink bubbles)
*Splash* X2

(Box)
So in hurry that I didn't spend any time taking off the clothes and...

(Bubble, M)
Oh, Ohh
Tight
It's tight...

(Box)
I'm, mating...!!

(Bubble, M)
I haven't met one so tight in a long time...!
2nd & 3rd frame, on the middle
(Box)
Mating...!
His genitals and my genitals are joined together and...

(Box)
We are... mating...

4th frame, bottom
(Bubble, M)
Are you fine with us doing it this hard?
How about this?

Looks like you're doing well
You are holding my penis pretty tightly

(Bubble, M)
Ah, it's top-grade...
Feels so good

I'm about to lose it...
This hole is worth plunging into

(Box)
It's definitely nothing but mating...

(Box)
Just like animals
Only to satisfy... one's sexual urge

Two genitals are joined, and rub each other, and It feels better and better...!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 21
1st frame, top
(Box)
He changes the position so I can't move my body
and he cums

(Box)
All sperm is flowing into me...

(2 Pink bubbles)
*Splash* X2

(Bubble, M)
Oooooh
Can't hold it...

(Box)
It splashes so hard that I can hear it
I cannot do anything but receive the flow...!
2nd frame, middle
(Bubble, M)
It's not enough for me at all

You don't have to do anything so, so...

(Box)
Sloppy... hot, sticky sperm... is flooding out

(Bubble, M)
It's such a tiny hole but...
Much easier to move this way...!

(Box)
He doesn't get tired
and starts to move again...
around me...

(2 Pink bubbles)
Byu*Pu

Gu*Byu
Byu*PU
(Same as the one on page 9)

3rd frame, bottom right
(Bubble, M)
See, it reached your deepest place...!
It must be the first time even for a girl like you
I'll teach you what it is like


(Bubble, S)
No...h
Did you, know that...?

(Bubble, S)
No...

You are... such a naughty...man...!

3rd frame, bottom right
(Box)
Getting on his belly...
He's totally taking the lead

Huge penis penetrates me and my waist twitches upward...!

(Box)
He came again...!
Bursting sperm hits me and I'm getting light headed...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 22

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, M)
You look even cuter when you're undoing the buttons(*) [Red's comment: I THINK THAT SOUNDS GOOD]
Oh... please don't take off the shirt

(Box)
...Even though he asks me some strange things

(Bubble, S)
Huh? Huuh...?
I don't care but...
You have... strange taste...

(Box)
It's hard... to refuse...
After once I... did it with him...
I can't treat him coldly

2nd frame, top left
(Box)
T, this (pose) is...
No..
I can't think straight...

(3 pink bubble)
*Drool* *Squirt* *squirt*

(Bubble, Man)
Looks like your body went limp...
Right right...
I'm ready to do it

Well, what does this cute hip wants?
Where does it want?

(Box)
I didn't answer his dirty questions...
That's ... easier...

(Bubble, S)
I...

I... don't... know

(pink bubble)
*Grasp*

3rd frame, middle left
(Box)
He was using my embarrassment against me and I couldn't say anything...

(Bubble, M)
He-ey Let's combine!


(Bubble, M)
My dick feels so good doesn't it?

(Box)
...!
His dirty words arouse me

4th frame, bottom
(3 pink bubbles)
*Sloppy* *Splash*

(Box)
I move my hip closer to him
hearing his dirty words...

(Box)
To feel better and better
...by joining with him...

(Bubble, M)
How about this,
Feels good right?
It's a dick can you feel it?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 23
1st frame, top
(Box)
...little by little
My body... turns... into jelly

(Bubble, M)
Oh, Oh
How naughty
sticking on my dick

(Box)
We have sex... again... and again... without thinking of anything...

(Bubble, M)
Now I see that you really are a fast learner...

(Box)
For nothing... but, to feel, good... only...

2nd frame, bottom right
(Box)
May be... it's O.K... to stop...suppress... what I feel...

(2 pink box)
*Sloppy* *Sloppy*

(Box)
I'm not a... kid... anymore
I already... had sex and...
and I felt... good...

3rd frame, bottom left
(Box)
little by little...
Naughty thoughts fill my brain... and whirl around in there

(Box)
He pours out sperm into me, like tempting me

(3 pink bubbles)
*Squirt* X3

(Box)
Sperm... flows inside my belly... makes me faint over and over...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Page 24
1st frame, top left
(Bubble, S)
I just laughed at that time but actually
I was really surprised

2nd frame, top middle
(Bubble, M)
...I must say that you're living a very unusual life...

(Bubbl, S)
Big sister never explained anything to me and...

(Bubble, S)
My eyes nearly popped out when I just enter that room.

(Bubble, M)
Your big sister, huh?
She's like...
experienced with these things

(Box)
...It's strange

3rd frame, top left
(Bubble, S)
Me?
No, I'm not familiar with such a things

(Bubble)
*Hm*

(Bubble, S)
I've never been to... the place like this before

(Box)
(That I'm talking with him)
Without being shy...
In the place like this
With this loose appearance ...

4th frame, bottom right
(Bubble, M)
That innocence and flat breasts
You're just like my daughter

(Bubble, K)
Whaat?
If you say indelicate thing again I'm gonna explode you...


(Bubble, M)
What, you gonna threaten me to give up man's ideal?
You're asking the impossible

5th frame, middle left
(Box)
May be this is why big sister sent me here...
There're so many different people, with different views...

(Bubble, M)
How about some after-meal exercise?

6th frame, bottom left
(Box)
My heart totally melted and relaxed after this...

(Box)
I felt pleasure while learning about many kinds of positions...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 25

1st frame top right
(Bubble, S)
The best?

2nd frame top middle
(Bubble, S)
L, let me think
Hm...

Uh... Well
T, the one that...
from behind... may be?

(Bubble, S)
N...o
You ask me strange things so suddenly.

3rd frame, top left
(Bubble, M)
I can't ask such a question to my daughter
Come on, I thought we are friends now.

(Bubble, S)
Friends...
Do you think so...?

(Box)
Strange... He's saying definitely dirty things to me but...
I don't really feel uncomfortable...

4th frame, bottom right
(Bubble, M, covered by next bubble)
You know, so called sex friends

(Bubble, S)
Just as expected!
I knew you were gonna say that

(Bubble, S)
Noooooh
you pervert, perveeeeeert
Ooooh
It's hard again

5th frame, bottme left
(Yellow bubble)
Feels good maybe...

(2 Pink bubble)
*Spank* *Spank*
(or *slap*... or *fap*?)

(Box)
He made me cum over and over until his erection ended...
No wonder he calls me sex friend...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 26

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, S)
Phew...

(Box)
Suddenly... I get sober and...
I found that sense of shame has come back to me...

2nd frame, top left
(Bubble, S)
This bathroom is g, great, isn't it?

(Bubble, M)
Right, Right...
Come to think Speaking of bathrooms, yesterday we did GREAT things with your big sister.

(Bubble, S)
Huh?
...After that?
With all of you guys...?

3rd frame, bottom right
(Bubble, M)
The girl that we just gang-banged
said to me innocently, 'Please let me wash you'...

4th
(Bubble, M)
So we washed each other and I made her so happy she cried

(Bubble, M)
It made me horny beyond my age
Then she regained her strength and
She is nice girl

(Not in the bubble or box neither, on the Skuld)
Was that so? Hmm...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 27

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, S)
How...

(Bubble, S)
Howwwwcome...!

2nd frame, top left
(Bubble, S)
N-o-t anymore~~
I just washed myself-!

(Bubble, M)
I know, I know
I don't have time, too
I left my work undone...

(Bubble, M)
Well I guess it's
a bad thing doing it with a young girl

3rd frame, middle left
(Bubble, S)
TTTTTT
then-....

(Bubble, S)
This is the LAST O.K.?
I'm telling you seriously...

It's just...
to help you...

4th frame, bottom right
(Bubble, M)
Wait Wait
Isn't that you who want to do it?

Look, I can't see that well because it's behind your belly but
You're moving your hand, aren't you?

(Bubble, S)
N, NN
No I'm not
I'm nooot

Ha...
Ha...Ha

5th frame, middle left
(Box)
Licking Sleipnir for the first time in my life...

(Box)
I move my mouth as hard as I can to make him cum faster but...

6th frame, bottom right
(Box)
He holds my head and start to move his waist...

(Box)
It would be faster if I could mate with him... I guess...

(Pink bubble)
*Squirt* *Squirt*

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 28

1st frame, top right
(Box)
...Although
We were still in heat after we returned to his work

(Box)
He got an erection while working and caught me...


2nd frame, top middle
(Box)
Touching our genitals and rubbing them together

(Box)
Playing around with each other only to have pleasure

3rd frame, top left
(Box)
I like this animal-like thing...

(Box)
This dirty, reproductive urge makes me thrilled...

4th frame, bottom right
(Box)
He's immersed in my body...

(Bubble, M)
Yes Yes
It's...
Oh... Ooh...!

(Box)
And I'm getting immersed in his desire...

5th frame, bottom left
(Box)
He wants to cum in me...

(Box)
And I can't stop myself from wanting his sperm...!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 29

3rd frame, bottom right
(Box)
...He rubs his remaining sperm on me...

(Box)
Looks like he likes that sticky thing plastered on my hair...

4th frame, middle left
(Bubble, S)
Uhhhh....

It smells so strongly...

Anyone could know it...

(Pink Bubble)
*Sticky*

5th frame, bottom left
(Box)
After he came I...

(Box)
...Remembering what I did that time
...still makes me feel dizzy.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 30

1st frame, top right
(Box)
I told him it's all over me and I cannot wear those clothes anymore and
He gave me others to change into...

(Yellow bubble)
Mimetic word for 'Baggy'(or 'Loose')

2nd frame, top left
(Not in the box or bubble)
President,
It's sexual harassment

(Not in the~)
No it's not.
It's skinship.

(Not in the~)
I'll sue you

(Not in the~)
<Don’t. Anything but that…>

(Box)
In the office room filled with sunset...

We fooled around doing silly things...

3rd frame, middle left
(Box)
He grasped my breast but It's not unpleasant...

(Bubble, M)
You need some improvement in this part.

(Bubble, S)
It's sexual harassment

(Box)
I certainly became honest... and daring

4thr frame, bottom
(Bubble, S)
Look, mister
Do you like my body...?

...O.K
I'll be yours

(Bubble, S)
Teach me more and more...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 31

1st frame, top
(Bubble, extra with short hair)
-Hey, don't you think so?

It's suspicious-
Absolutely suspicious-

(Bubble, extra with short hair)
I heard it from president's office
I swear

(Bubble, extra with long hair)
But... he said, she is his niece... didn't he?

(Bubble, extra with short hair)
Nonsense!
Do you believe that?
She doesn't resemble him at all
I have seen his wife before and
She doesn't resemble his wife either

2nd frame, middle right
(Bubble, ?)
...It can't...

(Bubble, E.w.L.H, guessing by tone)
But she's a little girl...

(Bubble, E.w.S.H, guessing by tone)
Right but, there's something about that man, the so-called president!
He looked so excited today

(Pink letter)
*Twitch*

(Bubble, E.w.L.H, guessing~)
Um...

3rd frame, bottom
(Yellow letter)
*Sneak* *Sneak*

(Bubble, E.w.L.H)
B, but
I think I can understand it...
He's like... you know, he amuses people around him... don't you think so?

(Bubble, E.w.S.H)
Whaaaaat
Oh dear what kind of taste in men is that?

(Bubble, E.w.L.H)
No I'm just...

4th frame, bottom left
(Bubble, E.w.S.H)
Hm... right
If he works hard and...
Considering all possibilities then,
It's not impossible...perhaps?

(Bubble, E.w.L.H)
Haha...
right, right...

(Bubble, S thinking)
You are pretty hot, Mister.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 32

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, S)
Nooooooooo!!

2nd frame, top right
(Bubble, S)
H, How could you take me to this place...
I can't believe it...!

(Box)
During work
The place we arranged to meet is...

3rd frame, top left
(Bubble, M)
Hey hey, What happened to that curiosity you just showed?
Where is that daring girl?

(Bubble, S)
You're Mister Pervert...

Nasty... Vulgar... immoral...

(Box)
Opposite to what I'm saying,
I'm walking in...!
I can't run away

(Bubble, M)
This place is enclosed and hard to find.
People rarely come here.

4th frame, bottom right
(Bubble, M)
Phew...
I was so busy that I forgot to relieve myself

(Box)
I won't be fooled
He won't really do it
He's testing me...

5th frame, bottom left
(Bubble, S)
!!
No...
W Wait...

(Bubble, M)
Sorry
I think I drank too much last night

(Bubble, S)
No way...
You're really...
No...o...

(Bubble, M)
Never seen this before?
Take a look if you're interested
I don't mind.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 33

1st frame, top
(Box)
There's no reason I want to see it
...But this scene I'm watching for the first time in my life
strongly impresses me ...

(Box)
In the dead ahead of me
Sleipnir started without any hesitation

(Handwritings)
*Startle*

(Box)
Hard to breath...
Thick air sticks to throat and
makes my heart beats faster...

(Box)
I can't move...
He fingers it with a wicked smile on his face

2nd frame, middle right
(Box, center of page)
It finished with satisfaction and then

3rd frame, middle left
(Box)
Slowly...

4th frame, bottom right
(Bubble, S)
N...o...

(Bubble, S)
Mister...
Not in ...here...

(Bubble, M)
Your voice is shaking

You get excited that much
What a bad girl

(Handwritings)
*Startle*

5th frame, bottom left
(Bubble, S)
Ah...

Mister...
No... No...

(Bubble, M)
Oh look at this
Here's another toilet

I got it I got it
Let me see...
I gotta relieve myself in here too

(2 pink bubble)
*Splash*

(Handwritings)
*tremble*

(Bubble, M)
It doesn't even have cover
Very good

It's a tiny toilet but
I think I can use it.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 34

1st frame, top right (Pass 4 bubbles cuz it's just a moan)
(Box)
Still in the standing position...
He came for a surprisingly long time...

(3 pink bubbles)
*Drool*

(Box)
Just like that persistent sex...
It runs down so slowly and draw some patterns on the floor...
2nd frame, top left
(Box)
Do... Do I look like I'm
...peeing?(*)


(Box)
After saying what suddenly came to me
...I flinched

(Pink bubble)
*Gulp*

3rd frame, under the 2nd frame
(Bubble, S)
I won't forgive you no matter what you say
Waaaaagh

(Bubble, S)
Won't say anything then

(Box)
Because I realize that it may be true...

4th frame, middle
(Bubble, M)
It's not over yet

(Bubble, M)
Sit over there

(Bubble, S)
Uh...

(Buuble, M)
I didn't freshen up yet

5th frame, bottom right
(Box)
Usual and unusual
Morality and immorality

(Box)
The boundary between them is shaking and... vanishing...

6th frame, bottom left
(Box)
Or probably it's already melted and vanished long time ago

(Box)
And already flowed far away...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 35

1st frame, top right
(Box)
I open my legs...
As he told me

(Box)
As he called me a toilet

2nd frame, top right
(Box)
His palm, holding me up , is a little cold...

(Box)
The air in the stall gets stuffy
heated by our hot breaths...

(Bubble, M)
You’re squeezing me tight.

It's a good hole...
You really have a nice pussy♡

(Box)
Our intimate parts are joined together...
Rubbing and clinging...
...I tried my best to keep my senses but...

(Box)
Irresistible pleasure breaks me down
Every time he pokes me...

(Bubble, S, top left of frame)
Ah...
I... like your.. THING, too...
It feels... so good
So good...

(Bubble, M)
Yes Yes
You like my... THING

(Bubble, S)
At first ...I ...though

your... THING... is like... the one ... of horse...

(Bubble, S)
I'm gonna... mate, with horse... I thought so
...Haha...

(Bubble, S)
I thought I can't take it...
...But I did
...actually...
Surprised...

3rd frame, bottom right
(Bubble, M)
You were worried because of your tiny hole

How do you like this Mr.Horse?

(Bubble, S)
It makes me faint
When all of that thing came in♡

Feel like I'm gonna ...get pregnant...for real...

(Box)
He could know it... without asking
Thanks to my treacherous twitching vagina...

4th frame, bottom left
(Bubble, M)
Don't worry. I'm a man of honor...

I'll take my responsibility
so take my seed and have a baby...♡

(Bubble, S)
Ah♡
Ah...
Aah...
Aa...h

(3 pink bubbles)
*Squirt*

(Bubble, M)
...How about living together for a while?

(Bubble, S)
Ah... Huh...?

Yyyyyou mean getting married...!?
Ah I... haven't...

(Bubble, M)
Wait, Wait

I'm just saying that I could live with you
to teach this tiny pussy

(Box)
Suddenly...
I was proposed during the mating and
I came a bit more

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 36

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, S)
E...Ev
Everyday...?

Then...aaaaah
It will be, wide-opened
I can't, do it...
that much...

(Bubble, M)
You know I'm an animal

It will be easier if you become an animal like me, for sure.

2nd frame, top left
(Bubble, M)
Let me see what you learned.

(Bubble, M)
How are you gonna please me?

(Pink bubble)
*Squirt*

(Bubble, S)
No...
It's all sudden...

(Bubble, S)
N...o...

(Bubble, M)
Do you really want to give up easily?

3rd frame
(3 Bubbles all together, S)
Er... Er...
It's...

I, I, III I'll be your toilet so... let it out in... here... everyday
I want you to c, cu, cu, cum in me...♡

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 37

1st frame, top right
(Box)
Silence for a while...
We two, were provoked and got excited and
we are doing it seriously...

(2 pink bubbles)
*Sloppy*

(Box)
He released a great amount of sperm still hugging my hip...
I cum, twitching my body over and over
In the place I never been before...

2nd frame, top left
(Box)
I immediately started my job as his toilet and then...

(Box)
Someone came in...!

(Pink bubble)
*Squirt*

3rd frame, bottom right
(Box)
He told me to make some plausible(or likely) sound to trick that someone.

(Box)
He got an erection watching my red face...

(Box)
While someone was relieving himself out there...

He was relieving himself on me...

(Box)
While moving my hand desperately...
I got aroused and came again and again...

(2 pink bubbles)
*Sloppy*

4th frame, bottom left
(Box)
Knowing that there are still people coming and going out there

(Box)
We surrendered to lust and pressed to each other to let some steam off...

(Box)
Spiked by his pricking movement, the excitement and the shame are mixed up and
I almost lost myself

(Box)
He holds me on his lap, with my legs nastily opened.
He touches my hole and in a moment the pleasure raises even higher...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Page 38

1st and 2nd frame, Top right
(Box)
It stiffened, in a moment

(Box)
Then spurted out the sperm it was storing all at once...!

3rd frame, top left
(Box)
My body twitches and welcomes that sperm ...

(Bubble, S)
S...

Sperm...
Sperm...
Just came...

(Box)
I'm so sorry that his dick is cumming...
Flooding sperm is so lovely...

(Bubble, S)
Ho... Hot... It's hot...

Aah... Good... It's so good
More...

(Bubble, S)
Mo... more
Give me... More...

Cu...Cum...
Cum I'm cumming
Cu Cum...

4th frame, bottom
(Bubble, S)
Sperm...
It's.. great

(Bubble, S)
Sperm is coming out
Sperm...
Cum I'm cumming

(Bubble, M)
Yes...
Good... Just like that

Squeeze it all out...

(4 Pink bubbles)
*Squirt*

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 39

1st frame, top right
(Box)
I can't stop loving this moment of nothingness
Come to think of it I feel like I just
Said something...

2nd and 3rd frame
(Box)
Oh

(Handwriting)
*Bonk*

(Box)
Ouch

4th frame, top left
(Handwriting)
Ooh...
Somebody should clean this up...

5th frame, bottom right
(Bubble, S)
...Guess we are in a big trouble

(Bubbel, S)
No one's here
No one's here
Alright!

(Bubble, M)
Oh, Right on time.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 40

1st frame, top right
(Bubble, S)
Wait Wait..

Wait Wait a minute...!

2nd frame, top left
(Bubble, S)
He(Taxi driver) is, He is watching us~

No...
Do you really have to do this right now...?

(Bubble, M)
Don't you remember what you are?

Tell me what you are. You said you will be mine didn't you?

3rd frame, bottom right
(3 Bubble together, S)
...I'm... your toilet for ...co...copulation ...and letting ...out...sperm

(Big handwriting)
*Blush*

4th frame, bottom middle
(Bubble, M)
Very good! Drive faster

I can't wait to make love to this young lady

(Bubble, S)
Noooo

(Bubble, handwriting within, Driver)
Gee...

Please... Mister

5th frame, bottom left
(Bubble, S)
Hm... So you live here?

(Bubble, M)
I gotta teach you a lot of things since I took charge of taking care of you.

And this is a proper place for that.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Page 41

1st frame, top right
(Yellow hand written letter)
Pin-Pon (Door bell ringing)

(Bubble, Girl came out from the room)
Yes♪

2nd frame, top right
(Bubble, Girl)
Welcome home papa♪

(Bubble, M)
-Yeah, I'm home

3rd frame, top left
(Bubble, Girl)
...Oh my

We have a guest...?

(Bubble, Girl)
Is she your daug...

No, you can't be...

(Bubble, Girl)
Uh...

You are...

definitely...

4th frame, bottom right
(Bubble, S)
Huh...? Oh...

(Bubble, S)
U, Um... Uh...

(Box)
...Like this

5th frame, bottom left
(Bubble, Girl)
...Oh dear!
You bad man
Did you mess around with such a young girl?

(Bubble, Girl)
Looks like you didn't understand what's going on

Well it's pretty complicated but...
Let's be friends

(Bubble, GIrl)
Come in, please...

(Box)
Another new door...

(Box)
Just appeared in front of me...